# I don't like my MIL



## whitelop (Sep 25, 2012)

There I said it! I don't like my mother in law! 
AHHHHH. I went to the grocery store yesterday and forgot to get coffee. I live on coffee and get terrible headaches if I don't have any. Today was day two with no coffee, so I broke down and called her and asked her to bring me some coffee. 
I DON'T KNOW WHY I DID THAT TO MYSELF. I should have just dealt with the headache! 
My mother in law is nice. But she is a fake nice, the kind of person who always has a smile on her face and doesn't really mean it. She is an airline executive and makes the bucks to prove it. Not to mention that shes PERFECT! She works harder than anyone, got 3 promotions in one year and always has a clean perfect house. She's a good cook and does everything just right. She doesn't live her full time, she lives in Chicago. The house they have here is HUGE and nice. My house is not huge or nice. 
Its a farm house thats older than dirt and its about 900 square feet with a half story, so like an upstairs loft room. My husband just brought our new wood stove in to measure for the floor and my house is turned upside down. 
So she comes in and I see the judgment in her eyes! Judging me and my house. I hate it. 
I love my house, its special to me. It leans like a sonofabitch, half of the floors in it are raw wood and hard to clean. My stove and fridge are from the 70s and they're olive green. But they match my house, which is olive green too! With a rusted tin roof. Awwww yeah! Everything matches. My in laws hate this house and they let us know all the time how much they hate it. They don't think its good enough, and sure it might not be. But we're comfortable here. 

Look y'all, I'm not June Cleaver. I'm a stay at home mom, yes. But my house is FAR from spotless. I have animals in and out all the time. A poop machine that I call a rabbit and dog that smells to high heavens because I haven't gotten around to bathing him yet. I do the basic cleaning everyday and cook a good meal every night. I don't know what that woman wants from me. 

She never comes over here because we know how she feels about the house, but I needed the coffee today. (I sold my car earlier this year because I didn't need it. I never drive anywhere and when I do I use my husbands car, its not a big deal because I don't really have anywhere to go.) 
As soon as she walked in, I could see the judgement and it makes me feel small and sick. It makes me feel like I can't do anything good enough or up to their incredibly high standards. I know its probably silly to make all those assumptions just based on the way she was looking, but I know thats what she's thinking. 

I know a few of you have out spoken and crazy mother in laws, but do they ever make you feel small and incapable? 
I feel like I want to cry right now. 
So has the horrible mother in laws? I want to know that I'm not the only one. They don't call them Monster-In-Laws for nothing! 
Thanks for listening to me rant!


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## MiniLopHop (Sep 25, 2012)

Morgan, :hug: no you are not alone!

For me it is my step-monster. She is always super critical and nothing is good enough.

I suggest taming your inner gremlin: http://www.amazon.com/dp/0060520221/?tag=skimlinks_replacement-20

It is a cute book on how to stop the inner voices that we all have from being so nasty and hard on ourselves.

Tell your MIL that if the house bothers her so much then SHE can clean it or get you a new one, that should shut her up.

I signed up for a 10 week on line cleaning/organizing class. Part of it is taking before/after photos of what you were able to accomplish. At first I didn't want to partissipate because my house isn't close to as big and fancy as the other people's in the class (that posted first). I have miss matched furniture and no style to speak of, but it is my home and we are comfortable. I have very happy rescue pets and that means the world to me. I decided that if they didn't like it they could kiss my behind. The funny thing is that after I posted my pictures, others with smaller less fancy homes did too.

Don't let her intimidate you. I would be much more comfortable visiting you in your home, which sounds very welcoming, than her in her mcmansion any day. If you and your family are content that is all that matters.


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## whitelop (Sep 25, 2012)

Hahaha. We did tell her if she didn't like it then she could put the down payment down on a new house for us! She ignored it. 
My home is very welcoming. Its filled with old things and things that I've collected and my mom has collected. We have a love for antiques and they haven't looked better in any other house we've lived in. Here, they fit. It looks like they were part of the house. We have cook outs and get togethers here and people are SO comfortable in our yard and in our house. I know I love it, but she is just such a ....


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## CosmosMomma (Sep 25, 2012)

I'd rather live in a dusty old farmhouse than a NYC loft. I'm a down home kinda girl though and I like homes with character. Right now I live with my parents in a 2br apartment, and it's hectic. 

For me the mosnter is my dad though. He's an (donkey) and he treats everyone like crap. I love him, because he's my dad, but man I can't stand him. Add to that the fact that since his heart attack he's been insufferable, and it's just made him even more lazy. Rent and bills for this place comes to about $900 a month, and that's most of my mom's paycheck (I need to find a job but I don't have my diploma or GED so it's tough), and then we have about $150 left for groceries and pet supplies. 

He also NEVER. FREAKING. SHOWERS. >:[ srsly he takes a shower like every 5-6 months.

Lets just take all our "monsters" and throw them in a room together and let them duke it out.


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## Imbrium (Sep 25, 2012)

I'm familiar with that sort of judgmental person. my maternal grandmother is one of them, except she actually says stuff out loud... I remember her criticizing my weight when I was like 10 - 'cause girls that age need less self-esteem, you know? especially less than a year after their dad dies...

just remind yourself she'll go away soon enough and you can go back to enjoying your warm, loving, animal-filled home in peace! who gives a darn what she thinks? she doesn't live there. if you're happy with your home, that's all that matters - anyone who has snarky comments to make or even just think can GTFO. houses are meant to be lived in and if you enjoy your time in them, they're not gonna look spotless and brand new every second of every day (especially older ones).

oh, and if it makes you feel better, I find that people who seem perfect in every aspect of their lives have some sort of hidden imperfection or unhappiness just like everyone else... and even if they don't, there's no need to measure yourself by people like that - they're few and far between and most of us are a good bit more human


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## whitelop (Sep 25, 2012)

God, I LOVE the word snarky! I've seen it a few times today and I use it often, I LOVE IT!


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## MiniLopHop (Sep 25, 2012)

That is such a great description! I got bullied indirectly at weight watchers last week. That is the perfect description of what happened. She was being mean just to be mean, yet in this case she didn't have the guts to say it to my face, just raised her voice to make sure the whole room heard what she had to say.

How can people like that live with themselves?

In my step-monster's case she has said little things here and there that she didn't intend to be so mean when we were kids. I just let her squirm, I only see her and my father once a year so I'm not letting her off the hook. She would literally have room inspections. If we didn't tuck in the bed corners tight enough or she found streaks on the windows you would think we murdered someone.


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## whitelop (Sep 25, 2012)

You had an issue at weight watches? Aren't you going there to help yourself, and make yourself feel better? Thats horrible. Why are those people there if they aren't trying to help themselves too?! Wow, that just got my blood pressure up! 
That kind of thing makes me crazy, because that should be a judgment free zone. Weight sensitivities are a hard thing to deal with, I know, because I have them. I think that places like weight watchers and gyms should all be judgement free. You're not going there to cast stones, you're going there to become more healthy. 
Thats why I like animals more than I like people. 

My step mom was a pain too. When she and my dad got married, I was 15. So I was already a whole person who had a personality and she couldn't make me into what she wanted me to be. A debutaunt. And I am no debutaunt! She was horrible to me. I'm sure I was difficult, I was a teenager. But she was very critical of me and treated me very different from her own daughter. They got divorced when I was 18 because of that.


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## CosmosMomma (Sep 25, 2012)

Brandy that sounds like how my Aunt was with her kids, and my sister is with her son. 

Example: On the phone yesterday with my sister I heard her tell my nephew "Fold your clothes and put them away right. I'm coming in your room in a half hour and if everything isn't folded and put away correctly i'm dumping every drawer" That irked me to no end because it was done to her as a child and she HATED IT. 

Well, my nephew is 8 and becoming a little smarty pants so he replied "are your clothes properly folded? I'm going in your room now and I'll dump everything if you dump my clothes" lmfao. Payback.


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## kmaben (Sep 25, 2012)

Yikes! I got super lucky I guess. It's just my husbands mom and his grandmother that passed recently. They both love me for some reason. He has two brothers and his twin is a complete idiot. His mother is the soft spoken Mexican housewife type. She doesn't want to step on anyone's toes or have the boys get into fights. I just recently chewed his twin out in front of God and everyone for being an inconsiderate donkey to his family during a difficult time. Then my mom has to step in to protect the mother in law. They probably think we're the monster in laws!


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## Imbrium (Sep 25, 2012)

hahaha... so he figured out two can play that game, eh? how fun


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## MiniLopHop (Sep 25, 2012)

That's a brave little kid! I think I would have been beaten within an inch of my life for just saying that. I hope it didn't get him into trouble.

The main argument she had was that because I had gastric bypass I took the easy way out, so nothing I said had any value. I have worked my @$$ off! I hate to blame genetics, but in my case I really think it is true. Anyway, I am 113 pounds lighter and still going. I'm off meds and feeling so much better, so she can just suck my big toe. I am going to a differnt meeting now and not going to tell anyone other than the leader about my past (I don't use the full points for my weight because of it).

I feel very blessed that my inlaws are wonderful and have always been welcoming. I will never forget meeting my MIL for the first time. My husband is a geek, very much into chess and history so he never dated much. When he said he was bringing home someone special for Thanksgiving he didn't specify much. When she opened the door she said with a happy face "oh, your a girl!" Apparently they all thought he was gay because he was too shy to ask girls out.


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## whitelop (Sep 25, 2012)

Brandy, congratulations on job well done in weight loss! Thats an amazing thing and it just put a huge smile on my face! I'm glad you changed meetings and it isn't fair for them to say you took the easy way out. I don't think there is such a thing as an easy way! Congratulations! :highfive:


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## CosmosMomma (Sep 25, 2012)

Brandy, I don't think he got into trouble, except maybe his video games taken away. My sister is a "holier than thou" type "Christian" and I put Christian in quotes because she doesn't act it. Over the past few months she has changed a lot and is becoming "Conservative" and does believe in corporal punishment. 

The one thing that irks me the most though is she's turned her back on our mother, because she thinks my mom "gave up" on her (my sister's) abusive dad, when she divorced him and gave my aunt custody of the kids to protect them. 

I'm proud of you for the weight loss too! I'm about 190lbs, if not more, and I'm not "fat" by any means, but I have family members that are constantly telling me I'm fat and "huge" and need to lose weight. -.-


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## MiniLopHop (Sep 25, 2012)

Thanks guys. I still have a long way to go, but I had a super doctor's appointment this morning for my 6-month check. No more blood pressure, cholesterol, or diabetes (was on two) medicines! I got it from both sides of the family, but not any more. My grandmother was 400 pounds, so we are all very large. I topped out at 339, so super obese. Now I'm just obese. I feel like I have finally taken charge of my life in so many ways. I have also learned to tell people off rather than letting them hurt me so easily with their judgements.

Why do people think it is ok to comment on other's weight? If I had one more doctor tell me to eat less and exercise more I was going to be violent, but at least it is their job. My step-monster was horrible about my weight too and she had no excuses. I was 200 pounds by 6th grade so you can imagine what the other kids said. It feels like fat people are the last group it is ok to publically make fun of. It makes me angry.


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## audrinasmommy88 (Sep 25, 2012)

Well, I think everyone that has commented on this post has commented on my post about my MIL. I cant stand her either. The sad thing is, she is nice to my face because of my husband, and I am nice to her face for the same reason. We dont want my hubby to feel uncomfortable. Needless to say, we are 2 faced to eachother. Really sad. I keep my house pretty clean, always cook a good meal (unless Im sick), always clean laundry, Audrina is always clean...but yet she still finds the time to complain. When I moved into this house when me and my husband started dating, IT WAS A WRECK!!!! It took me nearly a month to get everything organized and cleaned. My husband also had 2 cats (one died not long after I moved in, I made him get her spayed because she was peeing on everything and 2 weeks later we found her dead, really sad). So then he got me my own cat. SHE THREW A FIT! Didnt want us to have the cats. i told her "until you start paying our bills, you have no business telling us what we can and cant have". And that is where it all started. Then we got the dog. OMG I thought she was going to have a heart attack (but yet she has 3 dogs). But it was ok, because the dog was for our daughter. But then when we got Olivia, she laid into me. I guess because Olivia was strictly my pet, she had a huge problem with it. I told her to shove it. 

When my husband an i got together, the MIL was on all of his bank accounts. He was a total momma's boy. he had no idea what bills he had because she would go into his account and pay his bills online. So when we got married he went to take her off of his accounts and put me on and she said "Why dont you keep me on your accounts and open Rachel her own account and put money in it for her every week" SERIOUSLY!!!! Ugghhh, I cant wait to move!


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## bethepoet (Sep 25, 2012)

It's so good to hear people with stories about awful MILs, I only ever hear people saying how much they love theirs.

My MIL resents my OH and his sisters because they "stole her youth", but being the only male, OH got the brunt of it and she used him as an emotional crutch until he met me. She got very jealous and judged me/my family, but she hid it well. Just when we thought she was trying to help us, we committed to moving in with her for six months and it was then that her true colours came out. She bullied us for money, while allowing my OH's youngest sister to live there for free. She b*itched about us constantly to everyone else, it came to the point where everyone would go out for 'family night' without asking us, to "give her a break". I was the only one who ever did housework (the home they were raised in was filthy - my OH still has trouble understanding what 'mess' is to this day), but it was never clean enough. It was just hell, and in the end she went on holiday (the third free holiday in a year), came back and said we were making HER ill and SHE had to leave. So she did. Then she came back and gutted the house. It WAS her stuff, no arguments there. But she had moved into her brothers house, and had nowhere to store it, whereas we were still using everything as we were dirt poor and didn't own a thing. I'm talking the washing machine, internet router, even the pots and pans and cutlery. Nothing she needed, she was just doing it to be spiteful. We ended up spending what little money we had on junk food and basically squatting in our own bedroom until my mother could organize a van to come get us and what little we did have.

That was two years ago now, and I don't think my OH will ever get over it. We don't speak to/see her, obviously, haha. 

Ooops, sorry about the big long chapter.


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## CosmosMomma (Sep 25, 2012)

You guys and your evil mother in laws are scaring me away from ever getting married/close to it :shock: I'm not very good at holding my tongue so I'm sure It would be a war and OH would be stuck between the MIL and I.

Thankfully I'm single (well, I call my kitty my husband, cause he's bossy), and don't have to worry about that right now. :nope:


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## Nancy McClelland (Sep 25, 2012)

The only good thing I can say about my MIL is that she's so old she shouldn't be gracing us with her presence much long, I hope!


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## bethepoet (Sep 25, 2012)

*Nancy McClelland wrote: *


> The only good thing I can say about my MIL is that she's so old she shouldn't be gracing us with her presence much long, I hope!


Hahaha!


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## Imbrium (Sep 26, 2012)

*MiniLopHop wrote: *


> The main argument she had was that because I had gastric bypass I took the easy way out, so nothing I said had any value.


that's such a load of BS! from what I know of gastric bypass, it requires massive lifestyle changes. it's not like liposuction; it takes real commitment.

genetics does play a role in metabolism and weight issues (or lack thereof, for those lucky folks who can eat whatever they want) and you should be commended for taking charge of your life and your weight and doing whatever you had to do to live a healthier life. if you were truly taking an easy way out, then why would you be at weight watchers' classes working your butt off like everyone else??


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## CharmmyBunny (Sep 28, 2012)

i wish my owuld be MIL was a live she would have been awesome to meet unfortunately my BF mother passed away several years ago and im sad i never had the chance to meet her. my mother on the other hand is a .... well i cant say, but shes incomprehensible to me. she is very judgemental of everyone and a complete ice queen. 
she thinks my sister who weighs all of 105 lbs (Shes 24) looks great even though you can count her ribs and she looks like a slob she never brushes her hair it looks like and shes really selfish. she also got kicked out of school and no offense to any one but is all tattooed up but not in any cool way she has really ugly designs even she tries to hide now. she works as a shelf stocker and 2 days a week she works at a restaurant washing dishes. but my mom is always bragging about her ommitting things like her resturant job shes a dish washer and saying she chose to leave school. any time my sister comes home my mom is always saying how good she looks and blah blah blah but my friends secretly call her aunt b. 

i weigh more than i should but im not huge im 170. im still going to school i got a job working at a gae stop (where they are training me to be an assistant manager) but im lazy. (i didnt have a job for a while because i was in an out of the hospital for quite some time.) im always dressed inappropriately and she always says when she sees me i should wear a jacket. she tells me im holding myself back and i have too many animals i cant do anything i want because of all my pets. ughhh. 

honestly she loves my bf more than me shes always going on about him and how great he is. she bought him an iphone. i have bought all my phones and paid all my bills since i was 17 i moved out when i was 18 and live with my bf. and we do everything together pay our bills and take care of our pets. shes always saying how i should be more like him. 

belive it or not sometimes my own extened family that i see pretty regularly asks me how NY is (thats where my sister is) and i have to remind them im the one that lives in CA not NY. because even they forget probably due inpart to my moms bragging that i exist. 

and then my mom and my grandma are always saying how i need to do this or that because that how it should be and then when i say "uh im going to be myself i like that better" they get pissed and i have to tell them to shove it. in a less polite manner. i asked my mother once how muh she thought i weighed (she bought me something that was xxl) and she responed with all seriousness "230 -240" .... i dont even know what that says about how she sees the world. 

yeah i have a lot of resentment bottled up for her. a child wants their parents to want for their happiness and to be happy for them and proud of them. thats just never going to happen. my mother told me once " i hope youre not thinking about getting married you dont want to get married until youre at least in your 30's and have kids in your 40's" shes 65.... so basically she wants to be nearly 6ft under pushing up daisies when i have kids. and i told her " well i think thats my and M's choice when we do that not really yours. if you want when we do get married theres that bit about objections you can try to speak up then if youre invited."

i love my dad i used to have big issues with him but now we are mending our relationship and hes the only reason i go around any more seeing them 2 times a week i try to show up when i know my mother wont be home. he had a heart attack a year and a half ago and my mother actually put the blame on me. i know she was distressed and upset but i still remember it and wonder if she actually did blame me for it. though with the crazy that come out of her i wouldnt be surprised. oh theres just so much more. she is soooo ashamed of me that in the entire house there are only 2 pictures of me one when i was 13 and one when i was 2. you would think they only had one daughter. i could keep going but i wont ive ranted more than enough. 

its not just MIL's its mothers too. crazy crazy crazy.


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## whitelop (Sep 28, 2012)

Lauren, I'm sorry your mother is like that. 
I have a good relationship with both of my parents. My mom does make me nuts most of the time, shes just over bearing sometimes. But she means well. Your mother should never put you down like that, thats not fair. Like you said, you're not supposed to do that to your kids. You're supposed to make them feel good about themselves when everyone else fails to do so. Just remember when you have kids, don't favor one over the other, don't do the same thing that your mom does to you to your children. Stop that family trend. That actually hurt my heart a little reading that, because its not fair at all. I know life isn't fair, but as parents we have to give our kids the best fighting change possible. We're supposed to be there to pick up the pieces, not create the breaks. We're supposed to protect our children for all the bad in the world, not be the wrong-doers. 
I don't blame you for not talking to your mom very often, the best thing to do is get that negitivity out of your life. 

My MIL favors my husbands sister over my husband. I don't know why, shes almost 27, lives at home with my MIL, doesn't work and is 'unhappy' with her life because shes a weirdo. She spends most of her time playing World of Warcraft. She wouldn't know what the weather was outside unless she saw it on the internet. But, my MIL does everything for her. Pays her bills, pays for her things. She bought her a $1200 computer because she "needed a new computer." Her old computer was the best computer I've ever used. It opened programs in 1 second but it was too slow for her, she needed the programs to open in .2 seconds. Just ridiculous. 
Its not the way to treat your children. I only have one kid and I know if we have more, I'll never choose one over the other. 

Just remember Lauren, its nothing that you did. Its a flaw in your mothers brain. I'm sorry that you have/had to live that.


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## MiniLopHop (Sep 28, 2012)

Lauren, I'm so sorry your mom is like that :hug: It really sounds like she has some serious body issues herself and just can't get past them. Some people just should not have children because they aren't mature enough to take care of the child's needs before their own. You might want to check out the book "Mothering without a map" 
http://www.amazon.com/dp/0143034863/?tag=skimlinks_replacement-20
I found it very helpful thinking about having children with such a crappy mother figure. My mom suffered from severe depression and I grew up invisible to her. That was still prefereable to my step-monster that sounds a lot like your mom.

I also would take my husband's family over mine any day.

Although my MIL was hard on Joshua when he was a little boy. She ment well but made thigns worse. His brothers were skinny so they could eat junk. He was always a chubby little kid so she wouldn't let him have the same things, yet didn't get him to eat vegetables either. He turned into a secrative eater. She's a whackadoodle, but has a good heart. She was fat for a very long time and was trying to help him.

With a bit of happy news, I earned my 25 pounds lost charm at WW last night! That covers the last 15 weeks. I love the new group, it is so much more positive and open. I will never do a group at work again. I feel so much more energized and motivated.


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## whitelop (Sep 28, 2012)

Congratulations Brandy! 
Oh, btw I saw your pictures from when you had Wendell the Wandering Rabbit, and I think you're adorable! I know that probably sounds weird for one adult to say to another adult. But, I think you have the most comforting smile!


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## MiniLopHop (Sep 28, 2012)

:blushan: Thanks, that is very sweet. Perhaps that is why people talk to me about their problems a lot. I try to listen and help. :hug:


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## Nancy McClelland (Sep 28, 2012)

Just remember, a critic is the person who couldn't do the job to begin with. Ours is a food critic that could burn water.


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## holtzchick (Sep 28, 2012)

I actually also love my mother and step father in law however, I really dislike my father in law... Maybe I am biased since my mother in law told me how he emotionally scarred her after their divorce and how much of a liar he is. It's true, my boyfriend is a liar but he's working on it, he lies about things that really don't matter and he gets it from his dads side of the family. 

When I met his dad, he tried to be nice, although in the first 10 minutes I realized how egoistic he is and frankly I would be surprised if he actually liked me since everything I seemed to say, he seemed to say something completely opposite on purpose. He lives in Texas so he hasn't seen his son in years and was never a good father to him growing up. My boyfriends step dad raised and continues to this day raise him. So anyways, his idea of a "hey, I haven't seen you in years" gift was to give a Texas mickey of vodka which they drank the first night.

He also slept in our apartment for the next and the next day ditched us for some "friends" and then left. :/ 

Then I decided he was a real ass when my MIL called and told me that he absolutely hates Phoenix. She was nothing but sweet during his visit and giving him kisses many times. That man bothers me so much I could vent all day. The fact that he has spawned so many children makes me feel sorry for them. !!


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## CharmmyBunny (Sep 28, 2012)

oh i know ive learned after years of it that my mom im sorry to say there was a reson she adopted both me and my sister (my sister and i are biological sisters so... who knows) but some people shouldnt have kids. ill probably never really and truely forgive her for it all but ill always give her the chance to try and change. every time i do go to see her its with the mind set that we wont get into a fight and that shes actually going to be nice this time. im still waiting for it to work but if you think it it could happen. parents are so important to a person and yeah they should be there to pick up the pices and not make them. but i have my friends to help me up along the way. so maybe one day she will get over it. shes does have seriosu body issues i dont know why. her ideal pants size is a 00 yes a double zero. so being a size 12- 14 HOLLLLYYYY COW. at least in her mind oh well. im happy with how i look. im cute! so bite me mom. 

ill always remember how my mom favored and i will never do that to my kids. ill never forget when one of my aunts came up to me and said how shocked she was how i turned out considering how my mom treated us so differently. it was a bit of a throw back because i was convinced for a long time it was just me. and then everyone else started seeing it too. people think i exxaggerate when i tell them. when i first took my bf to meet my parents i warned him " so 1 my mom is crazy 2. youre not going to think i live there but i do. i am their dughter there wont be any evidence of that but its the truth. and 3. just watch the fireworks fly. " he was just stunned after he met them gave me a hug and a kiss and put a picture of me up in our place together. it was the saddest sweetest thing ever.


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## MagPie (Sep 29, 2012)

I don't care much for my sister's in laws. Good thing I don't have to see them often haha.


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## holtzchick (Sep 29, 2012)

haha. I have a brother in law but he secretly worships us... it's awesome


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## kuniklos (Sep 29, 2012)

Take some solace in the thought that people that uptight are seldom very happy. 

And she couldn't possibly be very happy without bunnies! Am I right? :biggrin2:


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## Nancy McClelland (Sep 29, 2012)

:yeahthat:


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## Imbrium (Sep 29, 2012)

I know I'm a hell of a lot happier now that I have bunns


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## MagPie (Sep 30, 2012)

Bunns make the world go round


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## whitelop (Sep 30, 2012)

So yesterday I went to the store to get some rabbit food, a toy for her and some dog bones. I was in the store with my son for 4 minutes, I get back out and my car wouldn't start! 
I called my husband, he said to call my MIL for her to come get me and then I would go get him and we would go and figure out what was wrong with the car. 
So I called her and this is how the conversation went:
Me: Hey, are you busy right now? 
Her: Just painting, whats up? 
Me: my car won't start, I'm in town. Could you come and get me and AJ? 
Her: Yeah, I have about 10 more minutes of painting left and then we'll clean everything up and head that way. 

I gave her the address and she put it in the GPS. IT TOOK HER 45 FREAKING MINUTES FOR HER TO GET THERE TO GET MY SON AND I! We were in a parking lot of the animal supply store, thank god I know the owner of the store and he was SO helpful. Then we loaded my car onto the trailer and we gouged the hell out of the side of it. Oh well. 

My thing is, she finished painting whatever it was she was painting and THEN came to get me. Don't get me wrong, I really really appreciate her and my FIL coming to get me, but when someone calls me with something like that; I drop everything I'm doing and go to them! 
MY mom thought it was ridiculous, but she was at work and I didn't want to bother her, my MIL was closer. 
My husband was pissed when I told him how long it took them to get there because they had to finish doing something! 

Ughh. I don't want to sound inconsiderate, because they did come to get me and my son. Its just the amount of time it took them and just the lack of care when I was on the phone with her. 

My husband and I share a car thats why he didn't come get me. hahaha. The only thing I needed to do yesterday was get rabbit food. I got it!


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## CosmosMomma (Sep 30, 2012)

I'd be p*ssed too. What if it had been the dead of winter and freezing outside? Would she have left you and the baby in the freezing air for 45 minutes so she could finish painting?

Nice to know where your priorities lie, lady. D:


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## whitelop (Oct 12, 2012)

This time it isn't my MIL its my FIL. He is the true crazy one out of the two. They want us to move into their house so my FIL can move to Chicago to be with my MIL. Our conditions were that my FIL be moved out because we can't live with him. He's very difficult, we also wanted my SIL to take her cat back to Chicago with her as I have 4 cats of my own. Those aren't very hard things to accomplish. As we talked about it more, my FIL said that we could all live together and he could do some work (unnecessary work) to the house, while we lived there. Then he could go back and forth between Chicago and here. We said no. Then we didn't talk about it for a few weeks. Now they want to move my SIL to the house and my FIL to Chicago. (they can't live together, she is also very difficult) They want us to live with my SIL in the house. I told my husband no, that I'm not going to take care of another adult, that I'm not going to clean up after another adult and that I'm not going to spend my days with her. (She's a know-it-all and thinks she's smarter and better than everyone, she also doesn't work, doesn't want to work and has no intention of working. Her mom pays all her bills and coddles her. She's also lazy and doesn't clean up after herself) He understands and doesn't want to live with her either. 
We haven't really told them that we don't want to move in. We just bought a new wood burning stove and we're doing repairs to our house, so they know where not moving in any time soon. So my FIL came over the other night to look at the chimney and I asked him to look at our kitchen floor to see what he thought about doing to it to make it better. My rabbit is in the kitchen. She was in her cage at the time. The hub went over the next night to help my FIL and my FIL went on and on about the rabbit! He said that if we moved into the house, we couldn't have the rabbit in the house. That we had to put her outside or in the garage. I don't mind outdoor rabbits as long as their taken care of, but my rabbit has never lived outside or in a garage. She has been with me her whole life and would probably think I was abandoning her if we put her out. Which I'm not going to do. My husband said no to putting her outside and tried to tell him in a nice way that we probably weren't going to move in. 
We have to handle my FIL with kid gloves, because hes unstable. 

The only reason he brought up the rabbit was because she was the last animal that he saw at our house. So she was freshest in his memory. But with him, it starts with the rabbit and then goes to the cats then chickens. Then I'm not allowed to have any animals there because he's insane. 

We're not moving there, so its not really a big deal. But I have to tell them this weekend that we're not moving into the house and that should go really well. NOT. My SIL will be there too, so it should be interesting. I just don't want to sacrifice my happiness and my rabbits happiness to live in a bigger house. 

Sorry this is so long, I just had to give some back story and explain it to people who understand rabbits and why I want her in the house with me. I'm sure others have had difficulties with in-laws and rabbits and/or other animals. So I'm sure someone can understand where I'm coming from.


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## Nancy McClelland (Oct 12, 2012)

We moved 800 miles away from family and just love it.


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## Anaira (Oct 12, 2012)

If you already have a house, then why would you move just because they want you to? Just tell them you don't agree with their terms and conditions. If they get nasty, just tell them the rabbit, cats, and chickens are more important to them than they are. That should get them out of your hair for a bit. Oh, and are better living companions, as they're tidier, cleaner, and generally nicer natured!


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## Imbrium (Oct 13, 2012)

I don't blame you, lol. if anyone told me my rabbits had to go outside, I'd tell them in no uncertain terms to get the f--- out of my house. it's too hot out there, I HATE it out there and I love spending time with my bunnies.


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