# Rest well, Zaide Katt.



## undergunfire

Our precious baby kitty, Zaide, passed away today around 4:00 p.m. .


I was {home alone, Ryan at work} outside and heard Zaide fall off the kitchen table. I heard him meowing in pain and ran inside. He was laying on the kitchen floor by the table. He looked at me, twitched his paw, and took his last breath. I could do nothing. I couldn't stop my beautiful boy from leaving us. He was gone.

I saw a bee flying around in the window. I killed the bee and saw that he had no stinger in him. Ryan and I suspect that the bee stung Zaide and he had a reaction to it and died. We also think that maybe the bee stung him, scared him, and he fell off the table and broke his neck or something. We aren't sure. Whatever it was, it was very tragic and he didn't suffer.

We took Zaide's body into our vet, to have him cremated and the ashes returned to us. This was the hardest thing we have had to do together.

I came home 2 hours early from work, Ryan's mom dropped me off home. Her and I sat around the house and talked about Zaide and how tiny he was. We played him him and laughed at how adorable he was and how he was never going to grow. After Ryan's mom left, I felt the urge to cuddle Zaide because he is so darn cute.

I just didn't know that minutes later he would be ripped from my life. He was only 7 months old, just a baby. We were waiting for him to grow up big like Juji. Zaide's whole litter was very tiny. I don't know what his outcome later in life would have been because of how tiny he was. We just thought they were "dwarfs". At this time, I do not think that his size effected his death. He was a super healthy kitty.


I sat on the kitchen floor screaming for him to get up. I turned my head and thought if I turned it back, he would get up to play. His little black body just laid there. I screamed and screamed and cried....nothing happened. The neighbors didn't even come over to see if I needed help (the windows were wide open, they were outside).

Ryan is absolutely heart broken. He cried his eyes dry, as well. He really loved Zaide. Zaide was "his kitty".

Juji is so lonely already. He was right next to Zaide when he died. Juji jumped from the table and just sat next to Zaide after he had passed. Zaide was his buddy, we got Zaide for him, now he has no one.

Zaide loved to terrorize the bunny room and sit with Marlin and Benson in their cages. They lost a good friend, as well. Zaide also always loved to sit on my lap and lick my hands/chin while I went to the bathroom.




This house is really lonely. I am/have lost two things that "completed" my life. Benson is going to his new forever home and Zaide has been torn from our home and this unfair earth.





Rest well, my beautiful little baby boy :tears2:...


































Our lives are so torn apart right now. It's so unfair.


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## Leaf

He was stunning. I'm so very sorry for everything - and for the pain you both are feeling. 

:sad(hugs))


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## NorthernAutumn

I'm so sorry to read about Zaide's tragic passing. You are right... that was very unfair...
R.I.P, pretty little puss...


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## Maureen Las

What a horrible accident!!! Such a cute little guy. Sudden deaths like this are the worst. 

I'm so sorry that you lost him Amy:bigtears:


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## RexyRex

I'm so sorry. 7 months is way too young. He was a beautiful cat, his green eyes were amazing!



RIP Zaide :tears2:


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## JadeIcing

I am so sorry. Call me if anything. I would do anything so you didn't have to go through this. Just remember you are not alone.


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## mouse_chalk

Oh no, Amy. I'm so very sorry. What an awful thing to happen. He was beautiful as well- I love the picture of him cuddling Juji. 

I'm thinking of you.

RIP Zaide ink iris::rainbow:ink iris:


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## Luvmyzoocrew

:rainbow::bigtears:


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## slavetoabunny

I so sorry you lost your beautiful kitty. :rip:Zaide


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## undergunfire

Thank you, every one :hearts.

Juju is really sad. He keeps walking through the house and you can just sense that he is very upset.

As for Ryan and I...we didn't get much sleep last night. We both have work today. I feel sick to my stomach, but I am going to try to make it through the day. I can't really afford a day off after having to pay for the cremation.


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## TinysMom

I am so sorry for your loss. It seems so very unfair to lose him at such a young age. 

His pictures are so special and you can see how loved and happy he was by looking at his face.

He truly was a special kitty.


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## undergunfire

Juju is just now frantically searching the house. He is even looking inside candle jars and my decorative baskets. It is really heartbreaking to see this.

I hate the feeling when your heart is actually aching, when you can feel the pain of your heart through your chest.

I don't know what to do for Juju besides love on him, but no one is here to do so when we are at work .


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## TinysMom

Can you give him a stuffed animal to cuddle with?


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## kirst3buns

I'm so sorry. RIP Zaide:rainbow:


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## NZminilops

I know that feeling well Amy . We had another cat, Clopsy, who was Brewsters best buddy and he passed away and she was miserable. She did seem to forget him reasonably quickly though, she didn't mourn for too long, I hope Juju doesn't feel miserable for too long as well. I never allowed myself to cry when Clopsy died, it made it worse, that heart-ache feeling still comes when I think of him.

I don't know what to say, losing Brewster is one of my biggest fears, so I can only imagine how you are feeling. I am so so sorry that this happened . 

He was such a beautiful little dude, I've never seen colouring like that.

Hugs to you and Ryan.


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## LuvaBun

Oh Amy, this is so awful. I was just thinking about you and how hard it is going to be to lose Benson, but then to have this happen - I am just so sorry.

I hope you, Ryan and Juji can help each other through this

Jan


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## Michaela

What a shock, I am so sorry Amy. :tears2: We lost a young cat suddenly 2 years ago, I know how horrible it is. 

:rip: Zaide.


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## tonyshuman

I'm so sorry. What a terrible thing to happen. RIP little kitty.:rainbow:

Hugs to you and yours, Undergunfire. :hug:


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## undergunfire

Juju is back to following me all over the house while meowing. He never strays more than 5ft from me. He did this when we brought him home, that is why we got Zaide, for Juju.

I don't think Ju would want a stuffy...I think he thinks I am his "stuffy". 

I called Juju and Zaide's foster mom earlier today and told her what had happened. She was really shocked and quiet upset. She said that when we are ready, we can come by and pick out any kitty we want, with no adoption fee.


I can't really imagine another kitty right now, not sure that Ryan can either. We do have to think of Juju, though. He is really heart broken right now. I told Patt that we will think about it and said she to let her know and that she will be on vacation for a week, starting Monday.


I'm just really "dizzy" right now. Work was so tough today and seemed like such a long day. Life hasn't been cherry on a sundae lately, and Zaide's passing has really just topped it off. I have major issues with panic and anxiety, that I have bern trying to deal with myself until Ryan joins the military, so that I can get help for it because we have no health insurance right now. It's really a daily struggle.



I just miss Zaide so much and hate being home. I miss him screaming for food and knocking down the NIC "gate" to the bunny room. I miss him licking my chin and hands. All I can picture is his little body laying lifeless on the floor.

Before he died, I was outside looking through the window at his beautiful eyes, staring for minutes, they were quiet crazy looking. I didn't think that minutes later I would be looking at glassy/lifeless eyes.


This is so hard.


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## Leaf

Amy I have a dog named Trinket who is about 5 years old now. She had been through more than enough when I got her - and then with me fostering animals - she always gives her heart to them but understands they are "babies" and wont stay.

Her pal Cujo was a constant though, and she knew it. When he died she had some serious issues, and for that reason I brought Jack home - a little guy my parents had kept when I asked them to take on a foster w/ pups from the pound.

She was SO much better when Jack came. The only problems was my parents liked me to take Jack to their house to visit. Trinket doesnt ride well in the car so she stays home. When I'd take Jackk away she'd be horribly distressed, especially if I were to leave Jack with Mom and Dad (Mom loves the dog and begs for him to stay overnight sometimes) - I ended up getting Trinket another pal (a pup my friend gave me ebcause her kids were too rough with it) who strictly stays home with her... and she's wonderfully content.

All of that was in a time I wasnt ready for another (or two) more permanant dogs because MY heart was broken, but for Trinket it was worth it and I wouldn't trade my crew for the world, even as unexpected as they were.


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## undergunfire

Thank you for saying that, Leaf.

I do know that Juju needs a friend again. I feel bad all together. I feel bad for Juju losing his sidekick and I feel bad thinking about "replacing" Zaide so soon.

When we went to adopt another kitty, Juju's foster mom brought his best friend from when he lived with her. "Blaze" is a 2 or 3 year old black kitty who is a Poly, just like Juju. We had him in the petting room and we just didn't connect with him. We adopted Zaide instead, in the back of my mind I always felt bad for not bringing Blade home because him and Juju used to be best buds.

Blade is still avaliable to us and my heart right now says that is what Juju will want. He will want a familiar friend. Do you think Juju will remember him? Is it possible for him to remember their friendship?

I have not a clue what Ryan would say to adopting another one so soon. I know he is hurting really bad and he may not feel the same way as I do right now.

Our home just feels really awful at this time. I am sitting on the couch with Sammy (our dog) on my left side and Juju curled up on my right side. At least, for now, they do play together (they run laps around the house). For Sammy, it is easy to take him to the puppy park to play with other dogs. For Juju, it's not that easy.

I am going to have a heart-to-heart talk with Ryan tonight, and see how we feel in a week. As for right now, it is obviously very fresh.


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## dquesnel

It is so shocking when an animal passes so suddenly like this- I am so sorry it happened to you and your family. I know it feels as if you are replacing Zaide by adopting soon, but please don't feel that way. You wouldn't be replacing him but the space he left behind, and that is not a bad thing at all. 

You mentioned that you have to deal with stress and anxiety issues- I am the same way, and have found it helps to take vitamin B tablets. It works and costs very little. It takes a week or so them to begin to work, but many people see a difference rather quickly. 

Cats have better memories than many give them credit for, and if he liked Blade before chances are he will still like him!


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## Bo B Bunny

Oh, Amy, I am so sorry


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## undergunfire

*dquesnel wrote: *


> You mentioned that you have to deal with stress and anxiety issues- I am the same way, and have found it helps to take vitamin B tablets. It works and costs very little. It takes a week or so them to begin to work, but many people see a difference rather quickly.



Thank you, so much. I will see if I can get out to get some of these today. I'll try anything at this point.


Juju has been waking me up during the night for cuddles. It's Saturday morning and I woke up at 6:45 a.m. because he wanted a cuddle. He has stopped searching the house, now he is just obsessed with me again.


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## ellissian

Im so sorry Amy  The loss of a baby seem's harder to comprehend. When i lost my kitty Cassy in tragic circumstances my other cat would walk around crying for her, it was heartbreaking to see her pining for her sister and best friend. I had no way of..


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## ellissian

explaining to her that Cassy wasn't coming home.  I eventually brought Casey into her life and her pain lessened. Thinking of you, Ryan and Juju. Sleep well beautiful Zaide ink iris:


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## TinysMom

Amy,

You will know when its right to get another kitty...and don't be surprised that even though you love that kitty - you'll still have times when you miss Zaide. But I'm sure you know that.

I've been thinking of you so much over the last few days - it is such a roller coaster ride of emotions when you lose an animal...

Whatever you decide...we're here for you...and Ryan and Juju.


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## GoinBackToCali

I havn't been on much the last few days.. Ali called me to tell me your news.

I should have written sooner.. but I have just been so busy tryin to organize this livestock show on our end..I am a bad friend, I apologize sincerely.

Last night, well yesterday. Jarred had been dead 5 months, and I found myself crying at 2 am, and for some reason you and Zaide entered into my brain, and I sobbed for another 40 minutes thinking about his lil gentle soul and you missing him. I felt so horrible for you, having to find him like that..

And now I am crying again.

Right before he died.. Zaide that is, I had looked at some pics of your fellas, and they had inspired me to look into gettin a lil kitten of my own, I just hadn't gotten around to it..

I will do so now., life's to short not to be loved by a furry thing that meows..

Love ya'll...know that I said a few prayers for you guys.. 

Z


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## BEAUKEZRA

I'm so sorry :sad:


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## undergunfire

Thanks, again, you guys. All of your words really mean a lot to me.


Once I finish my rabbit tattoo (chest piece)...I am going to get a shoulder piece that matches the traditional/vintage style of my chest piece....of Zaide...







I have always loved this picture of him because it shows what a little tiger he was. Zaide was my Tiger and Juju is my Panther.


It still hurts with him gone, obviously. I am starting to accept the fact that he is really gone. Sometimes, like when I get out of the shower, I can feel him sitting next to Juju right outside the shower. There are times when I turn my head and I feel like he is there.

I swear I heard him meow last night. He had this dainty little meow, not at all like Juju's. I had fed Juju and was walking out of the kitchen when I heard it.

Last night Juju slept like a baby in my arms in the chair in the living room, while we watched television. I got up and layed stretched out on the floor, and he came down and copied me...right next to me. When we went into bed, he wrapped his little arms around my arm and rested his head on my forearm. 

Ryan and I know he needs another friend, soon. He tries to play with me like a kitty, and it is hard because I can't play with him like that. 


Does anyone know if you can bring kitties on "dates" like you can bunnies? Does it make a difference? Ryan said we should bring Juju to Patt's house when we go to find him a friend, but I am not sure if he will "pick" a friend out himself?


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## undergunfire

Patt left me a voicemail saying she had a all black female kitty at their PetSmart adoption event yesterday, up for adoption, who was (somehow) related to Zaide. I didn't go because I was out to a wildlife park and it is just too soon. Ryan also said he really isn't ready. We also want a male, no females.

I'm home from work today. I had to take a "mental health" day. I just couldn't pull myself out of bed to get ready and go. I told Ryan I was sick. I wonder how the heck I am going to make it to even 32 hours this week. Ugh, things are really horrible lately .


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## NorthernAutumn

I'm sorry that you are hurting so bad, Amy...
Just so you know, when I had that little stray with me earlier this month, my cats yowled at it for a few days, then settled down. Sigmund started playing with the little gal, and really got into having a little puss around. 

In future days, I'm sure your good friend Patt would let you borrow a kitten to try out at home... i was thinking that perhaps Juju might be distracted in an environment where there are multiple cats If one happened to be challenging him, maybe he wouldn't gain the full experience.

I pray for calmness and peace of mind for you & Ryan, in your struggles...
Always happy to talk to you


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## undergunfire

Patt would definitely let us try out a kitty at home. Well, she is adopting it out for free, to us. I am not so sure I want a kitten. It would be too heart breaking because Zaide was "our kitten". He was 7 months old, but was so tiny, he was just starting to fill out and look like an adult cat....just in a smaller size.

I am not sure how our 9lbs crazy dog would be with a little kitten, either. I would prefer a kitty that is fully able to stand up for himself. I wouldn't mind a larger kitten, I guess, just not a little guy.


Ryan and I think more towards the end of the month we will visit Patt at her house or PetSmart, to look at some more kitties.

It is going to be really tough all over again when we have to go pick up Zaide's ashes :?, which should be after Wednesday, I guess....it will be a week, then.


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## undergunfire

We got Zaide's ashes back today. It is really hard imagining his body being ashes inside the plastic box .

He was cremated on October 6th. His ashes are on our wood stove in the living room, with one of my sleeping kitty statues resting on top of it. It will have to be this way, for now, until we can afford & find a really lovely urn.

For my birthday (December 8th), I told Ryan I wanted this...
http://www.memorial-urns.com/cat_necklace.html

That necklace urn really resembles Zaide, in a way, to me. I can have it laser engraved at work for free.


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## Leaf

((hugs))


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## undergunfire

Hello, my beautiful boy.

Mommy, daddy, Juju, and the rest of the family miss you dearly. Juju has lost a little bit of weight since you have been gone. All he wants to do is be near me. I know he misses you so much.

I had a break down today and cried in the bathroom at work. I just miss you so much and want you back here. It is still so lonely without your dainty little meow greeting us at the door when we come home. I wish you were home so that you could share a bite of my dinners with me. Daddy misses you trying to do every thing that you can to steal dinner off his plate.

Please take care of Mace, the guinea pig. You didn't get to meet him, but you will know just who he is.


I love you my sweet baby tiger :hearts.


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## Wabbitdad12

I am so sorry for your loss.


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## undergunfire

I keep missing my Zaide Katt more and more each day. I really try not to think about him, because it brings on instant tears and I remember the horrible moments when he died and I could do nothing about it. I just remember the lifeless look in his eyes.

I love our Tibi (the new kitty), but it definitely isn't the same as having Zaide around. Juju and Tibi aren't totally bonded, like him and Zaide were.


I just emailed Patt, Juju/Tibi/Zaide's old foster mom, to see if she still had Dexter (Zaide's brother). When we went to look at him to possibly adopt, she had said she would probably keep him since he might be sick his whole life (just like their brothers and sisters were). I asked her if she still had him, so I could go over and "hold my baby again". When I held Dexter (Zaide's brother), it was like holding my peanut-brain Persian mixed kitty again. I want so badly to hold him again. I hope she still has Dexter and he didn't pass on too...it will really break my heart.


I just want my little tiger back :cry1:.


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## undergunfire

Pat still has Dexter (Zaide's brother) :hyper:! She wants me to call her on Monday to plan a day next week for me to go and see him. I sent her an email back asking if he was still a little guy (he is a dwarf, just like Zaide was) and if he still had health issues.

I am so excited. I will definitely bring my camera. I hope I don't sneak him home in my pocket .


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## undergunfire

Today marks 1 year since my Zaide has been gone. I've been having a rough couple of weeks because of life in general....and today was a day I knew I didn't want to face. I still miss him so much, everything that happened is still very fresh in my mind.

I guess one thing that gives me hope is that through having Peg talk to an animal communicator for me to reach Zaide....he said he was coming back to me. The other night I was crying about Zaide and I got the image in my head of a little fluff ball....it was a black "doll faced" Persian kitten staring at me and he had Zaide's eyes. I then got onto the computer and started researching the true Persian breed & finding reputable breeders. I know in my heart that Zaide sent me the image of the Persian kitten...I knew that my next cat had to be a black Persian.


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## kirbyultra

:hug:


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## Fancy77

:rip:Zaide


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