# 14 year old daughter driving me crazy



## bat42072 (Feb 9, 2008)

My 14 year old got suspended last week.. This girl hit her over a boy and my daughter beat the crap out of her... she was suspended for three days the other girl got a ticket... now my daughter got a ticket for disrupting the class and has to go see the judge onfeb. 25... she accidently threw away her homework away when she cleaned out her notebook in class the teacher told her to get it out of the trash and she told the teacher she was not sticking her hand in the nasty f****** garbage... she got sent to the office and got in a screaming match there with the ast. principle and then screamed at the school police officer... they gave her on school suspension... I know this is no excuse but she has adhd and the doctor is trying to adjust her meds. I will be in the nut house before we find the right dosage... she is grounded right now and treating every one like crap around here... I want to go on a long vacation and leave her here with her father but i can't...


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## pamnock (Feb 9, 2008)

My heart goes out to you and may God give you strength during these "terrible teen with ADHD" years. 

Are you sure you can't get away for a "little"hiatus until your daughter reaches her early 20's and mellows out a little?





Pam


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## bat42072 (Feb 9, 2008)

I wish... lol I ave a 16,14, and 11 year old all girls,, lord help me... 

I told my family today I was goind to stay at my moms until they treat me with respect


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## pamnock (Feb 9, 2008)

*bat42072 wrote: *


> I wish... lol I ave a 16,14, and 11 year old all girls,, lord help me...



16, 14, 11 - All girls??? How have you been able to maintain your sanity?????????



Pam


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## trailsend (Feb 9, 2008)

My heart goes out to you too! I can only imagine the stress. This is why I only deal with my nices, they are in their teens now and cause me enough worry and stress.I hope they get her meds straightened out, I'm sure that is not helping anything. Ah, sorry the difficult phase has set in... I wish girls could just *skip* it... if only they could see past their teenage years...


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## bat42072 (Feb 9, 2008)

it is really hard... The oldest one is in drivers ed. i really don't want her driving... I make hubby take her to practice...lol... the 11 year old is still good... but for how long? Oh well still gotta love them... Keeping the boys away is even harder... the only other teenagers in our neighborhood is... you guessed it.... the dreaded....BOOOOYYYYSSSSSSSSSSS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!


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## undergunfire (Feb 9, 2008)

I am so sorry, girls can be "all-out" now-a-days.


I sooo hope I have a boy when we decide to have a baby.


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## Brandy456 (Feb 9, 2008)

..Comming from a teenager.

Highschool sucks. Alot of kids try and get you in trouble while presenting the teacher as innocent and getting the other one in trouble. 

You may say "Why dint she tell"...No one does that. If you do you get classed as a 'Snitch' and a whole lotta people retaliate. I know Fighting wasent the right answer but its probably better then what could have happend in the future. (Im not saying what she did was right)

Anyways, Good Luck

Brandy

P.S Why don't you go on strike?? 

Lol


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## bat42072 (Feb 9, 2008)

I don't have a problem with defending your self... she would have gotten suspended even if she didn't fight back... I girl attacked her last year in the resetroom after months of threatening her and we warned the office that this was going on and they did nothing... so we told them what we told are daughter.. you don't ever hit first but you can defend your self...My daughter waited for this girl to leave the bathroom so she could go in (my daughter had heels on) this girl who is way bigger than my 90 lbs daughter pushed her down and proceeded to kick her in the stomach so my daughter gave that girl a black eye... my daughter ended up with this softball size knot on her stomach and the school didn't call the police or ambulance... when I got there i took her to the er... and she missed a week of school... this time this other girl was bigger but she didn't let her hurt her... I hate to say it i was proud that she can defend herself... Sarah ( my daughter) under normal circumstances loves everyone and everything... kids usually give her a hard time because she is not as mature sometimes as most kids her age... she tries though... sometimes it wears on me because usaully hubby is working out of town and i have to deal with it all... 

It used to be no one would let her spend the night at there house because they couldn't handle her but now she gets to ... and she has had a very rough child hood... when she was a baby she got 2nd and third degree burns on both feet , hand and thighs at her grandmas house and she had to learn to walk all over again and will have to have plastic surgery on one ankle when she is finished growing... then she got kicked in the ribs by a horse when she was older... she really is a miracle child... the doctor said if it hit her dead on it would have killed her... there was ahoof print on her ribs and it cut her for a flip... she didn't even get a cracked rib... she has an angel watching over her... 

i am thinking i may go back to work so i can get a break..lol


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## Brandy456 (Feb 9, 2008)

*bat42072 wrote: *

i am thinking i may go back to work so i can get a break..lol





You dont hear that much lol


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## Saffy (Feb 10, 2008)

Motherhood is SO SO hard ... well, parenthood ... The stresses we have had with our 19 year old has made me advise everyone never to have children. Wish I'd stuck with rabbits!!! :biggrin2:


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## Wabbitdad12 (Feb 11, 2008)

*Saffy wrote: *


> Motherhood is SO SO hard ... well, parenthood ... The stresses we have had with our 19 year old has made me advise everyone never to have children. Wish I'd stuck with rabbits!!! :biggrin2:



Amen! 

My 19 year old son, knows more about life then mom & dad, he decided to move out last year, my 16 year old son, *knows* mom & dad don't know anything and my 13 year old daughter still thinks mom & dad know *some* things.

I empathize with you. My 16 year old son has issues with certain teachers, but has so far has kept his mouth shut, he just saves it all forthe family when he gets home.

I asked my wife, if we could takeour daughter, the rabbits and dogs and move when he's at work. She was tempted...for a little while.

Last year I was contacted by the Air Force to voluntarily comeoff of retirement and back intoactive duty, I declined, there are days I wish I had. 

I do hope things get better for you bat42072.


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## bat42072 (Feb 11, 2008)

well things seem a little better... she apologized to her teacher.... and the ast. principle asked her when her court date is and said he would speak on her behalf... we will see what happens at court....

her insurance changed and guess what her doctor doesn't accept it so now we have to go to a new doctor... ooh joy... Starting over...


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## Bo B Bunny (Feb 11, 2008)

Um, it might be a good thing that your doctor is going to change. no medicine we've used has caused that sort of behavior. It doesn't sound like an ADHD problem as much as behavioral issues - cussing a teacher like that? 

Has she been CLINICALLY DIAGNOSED?by a child psychologist? tested with something like the Stanford-Binet test?

Has she had bloodwork for ruling out thyroid, lead poisoning or other health issues?

There are WAY too many children _diagnosed_ by one or two symptoms in a doctor's office or school and I wouldn't trust something other than the things I mention.

What medicine is she on at the moment that you think might have caused this sort of behavior and how long was/has she been on it?

Has she always had issues with inattentiveness? behavior? disorganization? impulsivity? being defiant?

14 is really late for someone to diagnose this sort of thing. Like,a lot ofkids are getting a bit better by that age.


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## missyscove (Feb 11, 2008)

Coming from a 17 year old girl... at an all-girls school, yes, I spend the day with 400 girls, I sympathize with most of what you mentioned, though I don't really know of any physical fighting within my school, it happens more at the all-boys schools. Girls usually utilize our amazing talent of fighting without touching eathother or speaking to eachother.
I wish you and your family the very best of luck. It's all really about luck. Honestly, sometimes I look at myself and I look at other people I know who do a lot more partying and such than I do and I wonder how I turned out so well. Honestly, I hope when I'm a parent I end up with a kid like me, because I wouldn't know what to do with a kid like some people I know.


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## JAK Rabbitry (Feb 11, 2008)

Have you tried having her neutered?


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## Bo B Bunny (Feb 12, 2008)

*:laugh:*

*JAK Rabbitry wrote: *


> Have you tried having her neutered?


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## JAK Rabbitry (Feb 12, 2008)

If I can't have my children altered, I'm clearly birthing the wrong species.


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## bat42072 (Feb 13, 2008)

*Bo B Bunny wrote: *


> Um, it might be a good thing that your doctor is going to change. no medicine we've used has caused that sort of behavior. It doesn't sound like an ADHD problem as much as behavioral issues - cussing a teacher like that?
> 
> Has she been CLINICALLY DIAGNOSED?by a child psychologist? tested with something like the Stanford-Binet test?
> 
> ...


she has had all of the test and she hasn't had a problem until they started adjusting her meds with her behavior... And i am not condoning her behavoir but i wouldn't stick my hand in a public garbage not knowing what kind of germs are in there and she doesn't usually cuss the teachers or even yell at them...


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## GoinBackToCali (Feb 13, 2008)

*Bo B Bunny wrote: *


> Um, it might be a good thing that your doctor is going to change. no medicine we've used has caused that sort of behavior. It doesn't sound like an ADHD problem as much as behavioral issues - cussing a teacher like that?
> 
> Has she been CLINICALLY DIAGNOSED?by a child psychologist? tested with something like the Stanford-Binet test?
> 
> ...


The Bo has spoken...

I have the 14 year old who is getting better..this whole thread just disturbs me..it does in fact sound more like behavioral and less like an ADHD issue. I have poured thousands upon thousands of dollars into my son's care..and I like to think I am pretty well versed in his issues, and what are and are not symptomatic of his disorders, and that type of behavior is not. Sorry.. but it's not. The fact that VISD actually got an attorney to map out what was actually symptomatic of specific disorders was pretty helpful as well, if not severely damaging to their case.
I am not judging you.. I am just saying.. medicating her for a perceived problem will lead to a whole other can of worms..it probably will exacerbate her other minor issues.
It could very well be she could just be like I was at 14... a pain in the rear know it all who has to grow out of it.. fortunately I did..

I wish you luck..

BTW.. I assume your going to Beaumont for help... using Dr. Kanneganti or Dr. Kaza?, feel free to PM here if you need to..


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## Bo B Bunny (Feb 13, 2008)

Sorry, I was only trying to help. I get a bit passionate about kids and their health issues. When I dealt with the whole dianosis thing it was ok but my cousin's son is an adult now and completely a mess cause his doctors messed up so bad with him.

Might be a co-morbid condition she's having trouble with too.... ODD - oppositional Defiant Disorder. The medicines can sometimes cause peaks in other symptoms.

I wouldn't want to reach into the trash either...... but if my children used that sort of language to a teacher or anyone at any time - they'd be basically wishing they were dead over their punishment - lots of nasty work you can make a kid do in the country!

I can't imagine a medicine causing that part of it, is all. I thought maybe she had something other than ADHD. Those conditions that entwine together can be quite confusing. 

I'm glad you had all the tests and such. I was just concerned. I've seen so many kids go through stuff cause some stupid teacher or school nurse decided they had to have medicine and a doctor thinks they can diagnose the problem.

When did they diagnose her, though? Seems really late at 14. I wonder if I wouldn't want to have someone check her hormone levels.... could be something more in that area... I know I've read someplace there can be big issues there.

Good luck. I know it's a pain and it's hard on the entire household when they are having trouble. :hug:


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## GoinBackToCali (Feb 13, 2008)

Funny, I was thinking it did sound alot like ODD... which Blake supposedly has. But, the business end of a pigstick pretty much worked that out of him.

Ya'll can condemn me for that now.. but I make no apologies. We reached a point where my son used alot of his disorders as crutches, and milked them for all it was worth.

My son's issues really started manifesting themselves around 2nd and 3rd grade. By 4th grade he was a train wreck. 14 just seems a bit past the age group for alot of those disorders..


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## Bo B Bunny (Feb 13, 2008)

We threatenLuke with military school. He did some of the same thing with his ADHD - milked it - or tried to..... but we nipped that in the bud real quick!


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## JAK Rabbitry (Feb 13, 2008)

We should form some sort of RO day care for young teens in which we make them shovel poop and poke them with pig stickers at random intervals throughout the day. We'll keep to a tight schedule so the kids have no room or reason to complain and milk their problems.

We'll start the day around 7....they can come to my house and shovel horse poop for an hour, then clean my rabbit house, feed and water the bunnies. Around 9 will jabthem with a pig sticker a couple times.

Sometime around 12 we'll break for a well balanced lunch of various tranquilizers and maybe some sandwhiches. 

We'll turn out model citizens by the end of the week.


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## Bo B Bunny (Feb 13, 2008)

:laughsmiley:


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## bat42072 (Feb 13, 2008)

she has been to several doctors and we have been dealing with this... we know our daughter... when her meds is right she is not this way... I don't beleive in medicating unless it is need... I would not just put her on meds unless we knew for sure that is what it is.. she was seen and all the test have been run... you don't know her you don't know what has been done ... I don't mean to be rude but until you have a gegree in this subject then you need not judge... she doesn't usually do this and the only time she gets in a fight is to defend herself... she is usually a great kid... I hope that i did not make anyone mad... we tried not giving her the meds function.. her attention spand is really really bad...

I don't let her use her adhd as an excuse...


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## bat42072 (Feb 13, 2008)

Bo... she got punished for that... i do not tolerate my kids treating teachers like that or any other person... She has since opologized to the teachers on her own that day... and we still punished her...


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## bat42072 (Feb 13, 2008)

she has been on concert for the past 6 years and thn it wasn't working that well so they added strattera to it... nd that is when we started having this behavoir... it was a trial thing before they change the concerta... now we have to go to a new doc. who does not know her history...


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## Becknutt (Feb 13, 2008)

Certain combos of medication work well for certain people, if you find something that works stick with it. I have to physically stand in the dr office and demand that they not change my aunts medications. The first thing a new dr does, or when some new med comes out is change her meds. I'm the one that gets to clean up the mess it causes, so I started taking a stand. I will not allow them to change her meds. It's a completely different issue, she is schizophrenic among other things but still if you know what works, keep her on it. Don't listen to the speeches about this new better medication...

I wish we could neuter away the teenage attitude, LOL! My daughter is just getting to that stage. She has always been a good kid, A+ gate student (ADHD, btw) She is just getting into lying about everything...and her "I know everything" attitude is liable to kill me.


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## bat42072 (Feb 13, 2008)

we asked her dr to change it because it wasn't as effective as it used to be... when her meds work she is wonderful ...I would preferr her not to have to be on meds...My oldest daughter was on meds and we took her off and she is doing awesome... we tried to take my 14 year old off her meds and it was a nightmare...


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## Bo B Bunny (Feb 13, 2008)

It read like she was just diagnosed! I'm sorry! 

You're right - we don't know her and I'm not judging - nor was anyone else. You brought it up - we're just kicking around info to you. It's understandable thatit's a touchy subject, tho.Zin and I both have been there done that (Zin has the badge of courage!  ) - and I have had some training thankyouverymuch..... I have worked in pharmaceuticals, worked with many special needs children and studied the co-morbid disorders such as ADHD, ODD, and general anxiety disorders in children.

Try handling a child that has asperger's syndrome and is dying from cancer. Been there and it sucked! 

Medicinescan be really funny. Case in point. I took a SINGLE nyquil geltab last night and I have not been able to function much today. Usually they don't make a kid start cussing people tho..... HOWEVER Stratterra sometimes does have "mood" related side effects and people react TOTALLY different sometimes.

Docs around here like that drug too - it's a lilly product. Indiana is Lilly headquarters.

Straterra made my son sleep and sleep and sleep. He had been on a small dose adderall for some time and they moved him to adderall xr - NO WAY. He had trouble with everything so finally I took him off all of the medicines and he functions fine. He is a high functioning case tho. He only had 10 mg of adderall at the last point. He wasn't hyper, or anything like that. He just would shut down if he couldn't do things perfect. He's a genius so his grades are great. He's not real social tho.

I'd consider zoloft - do some looking around about it. It has been used for adults with ADHD and it can help if there are some issues like PMDD going on with her.BUT be aware thatit works in similar ways as Stratterra. Stratterra works on the norepinephrine and Zoloft works on the serotonin. You would really have to be watching her and tell the school maybe? I liked trying the new medicines over breaks.

Concerta is a form of ritalin. It works as a stimulant (you probably know that) so depending upon how it was not working for her now - that's probably why they tried the Stratterra - to get her off the stimulants. (did she have episodes of being depressed or of being grouchy?)

Doctors cling to those drugs they feel best using..... they use them all the time. Not every kid will do well with those drugs. If you haven't already - start telling the doc what you think might work and ask him his opinion. Do the research if you haven't and then see what symptoms she has that you would like her to get help with. 

Good luck. I'm sorry if I offended you before. Honestly I was just trying to give you some info


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## JadeIcing (Feb 13, 2008)

Shhhh I should be on meds for a few things but I don't like them. Ifuction better with out them. Or atleast the voices tell me Ido.

I grew up with my brother who I nicknamed Pharmacy Boy. :biggrin2:He neededseveral medications to control his VAST amount of issues. He CAN NOT function without meds. He has tried that is why he was hospitilized SEVERAL times. Most times he told us I need to go in. He knows when he needs it. The last time was not long ago. I was so proud because this time he had to do it. He is 21 an adult for the most part. Yea he has a LONG way to go but he made it this far without getting in anyy major problems. 

Try to use it as a crutch?? My mother would knock that right out him. That there were times where when adjusting meds he would lose it oh yea. Curse? Oh god no. I am 25 and married....I still can not curse in front of my mom. Mind you she could teach a sailor. 

Anywayz I know one of the worst times with these kids is when meds are being adjusted. So I feel for you. We are here for you to vent.


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## Bo B Bunny (Feb 14, 2008)

That's right! 

Also, Ali, that's what I decided for my son. The problems with the medicines were worse than dealing with his social issues and maybe not getting 100% on every single thing. Most of the time he does or even over that. He's a straight A student. My niece - she HAS to have her medicine or someone might kill her.


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## bat42072 (Feb 14, 2008)

the school is no help ... we really wanted her off all meds... we tried it for 6 months and she could not function at school or home... i don't let her use it as a crutch...


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## Bo B Bunny (Feb 14, 2008)

I hate when schools aren't helpful. I've seen a lot of kids suffer because of that.

Well, I sure hope your new doc figures it out so she can get on ok and you can destress some. It's so hard on everyone in the family sometimes, too. Plus as parents we want to "fix" our kids cause it hurts too much to see them suffering in any form.

Keep us posted. We'll be thinking of all of you


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## bat42072 (Feb 14, 2008)

sorry i have not been on ...I was not home i was at the hospital with said daughter ... yesterday evening my daughter was with my neice at a park ... when a man, his wife , his daughter and 2 cousins showed up... he sicked his daughter on my neice and daughter and when they defended theirselves he attacked them and the mom kept yelling for them to beat the fudgeing b***'s ass... he broke almost broke my daughters nose and he picked them upp and thru them to the ground... i got a call from the paramedic that my daughter was in an altercation... the baseball coach across the street saw it and ran the guy off... someone got it on video and his license plate ... the police have not arrested him yet because they are getting the case together they are going for two felony acounts... they are also going after mom for egging it on... my neice got the worst of it... she has several nots on her head... the girl bit her and left a golf ball size not on her arm... my daughter is so scared that this man is going to come after her again that she won't eat... apparently my neice and this girl have been bickering back and forth for several days now... the girl lives in the next town but goes to our school... she (the girl) rode the bus that she wasn't on and had her dad meet them there and she pointed the girls out to him ... they left and came back in a different vehicle with more people... we have plenty of witnesses to the incident...


*edited for language *


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## JadeIcing (Feb 14, 2008)

:XI eant to find this guy and beat the living daylights out of him.


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## Bo B Bunny (Feb 14, 2008)

WHAT THE HECK!?!??! Why on Earth would this man and his family do that? An adult acting like that??!?!! and then this girl and.... 

Well, they should charge him and her and the mother! 

So your daughter and niece are ok, tho, nothing broken or anything? is your niece the same age?

Too bad the baseball coach didn't use a baseball bat on the idiot dad! :X


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## bat42072 (Feb 14, 2008)

my neice is 13... they are both ok... we want to find him and beat the crap out of him... but that won't help the case... we are pretty much asured that he will go to prison... it is on tape him attacking the girls... i didn't get to see the tape yet but i will.... my neice got the worst of it... he choked her and slammed her into the ground... she has several knots on her head and bruises on her kneck...she lives closer to them and i don't even know what he looks like... i am hoping he already has a record so he will get in worst trouble... this guy knbows there name and where they go to school... I am worried about his daughter she didn't go to school today... if he would do this to someone elses kid then what would he do to his own... he was supose d to go to the school for a meeting and he didn't show up... the girls are not going to school for the rest of this week... to let tempers die down... i am trying to keep other kids from getting even with this other girl... there are high school friends of my other daughter wanting to get involved... i am not blaming the other girl... i blame her parents for bringing her there for that reason...if he had a problem he should have come to us and not attack the girls...


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## trailsend (Feb 14, 2008)

This is outrageous... I am so glad they will be O.K., but how awful. I just can't stand hearing things like this - it's horrible enough with kids, but adults going after children? I hope they lock him up and make his life miserable. I agree with Bo - it is too bad the coach didn't let him have it with the bat.


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## Wabbitdad12 (Feb 14, 2008)

This couple are adults by legal definition only. This is hard to believe that parents would do something like this. To call them morons would be an insult to morons.

He must feellike a big tough manto attack a 13 & 14 year old.

With the witnessess and video evidence the couple will probably still deny it. What twits!


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## myLoki (Feb 14, 2008)

*What a b****d?! How could he just stand there and incite that way?! He should be in jail like...right now. I really hope your daugher and niece are ok. Quick recovery!


Also, I can't help but feel a little defensive of our position. (I'm an elementary school teacher.) We're over-worked, under-paid, and entirely under-staffed. I can honestly say I try my very best to provide modifications for all of my Special Ed. and 504 students. It's hard work. People who get into this field because they like the summers and weekends off don't stick around very long. You have to do it for the kids. We stay late and go in early and its till never enough. We spend more than half our "teaching time" with discipline. I hate to say it but the majority of our "behavior kids" lack something at home. *I'm not saying that is the case here because you're obviously trying very hard.* We get no help from home but we're supposed to "fix" this kid AND teach everyone everything they need to know to pass the standardized test because guess what... we get our butts kicked if the kids aren't passing. "Why aren't these kids passing? What are you doing wrong?" What am I doing wrong?! Well, I dunno... most of these kids are not at grade level because they never stop talking or sit still enough to listen to what I'm saying. I try to add as many manipulatives and games to help the kids understand the concept but some just mess around. **What people don't know about No Child Left Behind is that it is leaving more children behind than ever before. Did you know that a 6th grade special ed. student that is functioning at a 1st grade level now has to be given 6th grade work? Can you just imagine how unendingly frustrated this child gets? I see it every day. She is just not capable of that level and I have to force it on her. It's just so frustrating for both of us.
*
*
Wow that got long winded. I'm sorry. It's just so frustrating. 

t.

ps This is not intended to offend. I apologize if it makes anyone feel uncomfortable but I want to add a different perspective.


Bo B Bunny wrote: *


> I hate when schools aren't helpful. I've seen a lot of kids suffer because of that.


*edited for language *


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## JadeIcing (Feb 14, 2008)

*I give you credit and some teachers I know. I also know what it is like to have some really messed up teachers. To have them dismiss a child as a problem child even though it is clear something is wrong. Shoot even after knowing it they still dismiss that child. *

*I also know what it is like to have a teacher say that because you didn't get something you were useless and would never amount to anything. *

*I had over-worked, underpaid, understaffed teachers who were still amazing an so encouraging.*


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## Bo B Bunny (Feb 14, 2008)

MyLoki, I understand completely but honestly there are 2 sides to the coin. I know people just like you say - trouble at home and obviously the parents are clueless. I saw things going on with friends' and family and just had to sit back and watch because if I said anything - of course I would be the vile witch ya know?

I also had a son ina private school that couldn't seem to get the teachers to have someone help my son check his bookbag at the end of the day to make sure he had everything. He would freak if he had to go back into the building to get something (I would check his bag) and if we didn't catch something missed - OMG at home the entire night was a battle because of his perfectionism. This is a kid who COULD have an IEP, COULD use other things but functioned very very well and brought their overall testing scores up when he scored 99.9% in certain areas (they can't give 100% on those)

Why? because they were lazy and annoyed if they had to do anything extra - when they had it easy as anything since it was a private school.

One of my closest friends is a teacher and one of my clients. My client who is a teacher has told me that they don't even bother sending homework because it doesn't get done. She teaches in Indianapolis. 

Each situation is different I guess.... but I appreciate the input - I did say that "I hate it WHEN.... " which means I do hate that ... but I also hate when parents don't do what they should and leave it on the school. 

I helped develope a plan for the children in that school my son went to. It helped with all children who had problems with getting things done..... mainly adhd kids. I provided large bags of bubblegum. If they got their "tasks" for the day - 3 at first.. important things like homework, raising their hand (my son would yell out lol like horseshack - I KNOW! - impulsive!) and packing up for home - they got a piece of gum at the end of the day!

LITTLE things like that made a huge difference for 3rd grade kids! and they still use the plan for some kids.

Parents have to be involved..... regardless of disorders..... kids need the parents to know what is going on.


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## Bo B Bunny (Feb 14, 2008)

*bat42072 wrote: *


> i blame her parents for bringing her there for that reason...if he had a problem he should have come to us and not attack the girls...


I agree but SERIOUSLY - if they are just bickering over boys.... that's like a rite of teenage girls! ALL of them do it!


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## myLoki (Feb 14, 2008)

*These people are an embarrassment to the profession. To call a child useless?! They should be stripped of their license, tarred, and feathered. The will never know the joy of working with a student and slowly watching them grow. I can understand the frustration. There are days where I'm tutoring a few students (these boys are as bad as they come; one is a second grader that can't read and ADHD, a 5th grader that is oppositional defiant, and a first grader that has extreme anger issues and a "runner" meaning he runs away when he gets angry) where I just have to step out of the room for a minute and do some breathing exercises. It's easy teaching the kids that appreciate you, but the ones that throw kicks at you, pretend to fall asleep, and are in need of restraining because they run out of the school and into the street... those are days when I wish I'd stayed in bed. Believe it or not I have a couple of scars from restraining that one particular student. Stronger than they look...


t.

JadeIcing wrote: *


> *I give you credit and some teachers I know. I also know what it is like to have some really messed up teachers. To have them dismiss a child as a problem child even though it is clear something is wrong. Shoot even after knowing it they still dismiss that child. *
> 
> *I also know what it is like to have a teacher say that because you didn't get something you were useless and would never amount to anything. *
> 
> *I had over-worked, underpaid, understaffed teachers who were still amazing an so encouraging.*


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## bat42072 (Feb 15, 2008)

I am not ptting teachers down... we have some wonderful teachers but there are a few you wonder why they get in this profession... I understand that they go thru alot... and i know that i couldn't deal with that many children... its hard enough with mine.. my thing is when you tell the school there is a problem going on they don't do anything about it... the girl that got in a fight with my neice and daughter was in a fight with another girl earlier that day on school campus... my nephew saw it... the school did not know about it... they were suposed to call my nephew in the office and ask him about it and who else saw it... they never did...

as for the other thing... we heard they arrested that guy but i have not been able to confirm it ... or even if he was arrested for this incident or when the police got to his house if he gave them problems... i was under the impression that they were waiting a couple of days so the DA could get the case in order... they wanted to file 2 different charges of assault of a minor...they want him to get more time in the pen..


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## bat42072 (Feb 15, 2008)

they did not arrest the man yet... i heard that he paid is daughter $100 fight them ... not sure how true it is...


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## bat42072 (Feb 22, 2008)

Update:

hubby went to sign the papers to press charges... the detective was saying this is an open and shut case... he is saying that he didn't do it..but there are several witnesses the tape of it wasn't very good the kid filming it was shaking really bad... they are waiting for 2 witnesses to fill out their statements one is my neices dad where she called him saying: Daddy help... this man got me and then the phone went dead... that was when the man thru her... and another grown up saw what happened from his window and he is going to fill out a statement... The detective says their is a long line of officers wanting to be the ones to arrest this man for what he did... and the detective also said she called him white trash for what he has done to the girls...


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## Wabbitdad12 (Feb 22, 2008)

That is good news to hear!


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## trailsend (Feb 22, 2008)

Gosh.. I am just so sorry this happened. But am so relieved to hear they are going to give it to this guy.


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## bat42072 (Mar 7, 2008)

just an update... they were suposed to arrest the gut today... haven't heard though


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## angoragrl (Mar 7, 2008)

I'm sorry to hear about what happened to your daughter and your neice. 

I wanted to let you know that your daughter sounds a lot like my little sister. At about the age that your daughter is, my parents started having a lot of problems with her (she has ADHD too). She has always had trouble in school, but not real behavioral issues, and she started lashing out at home A LOT. This corresponded with a change in her medicines too. After they got her medicines back in order, she got much better. The hormones were playing a big role too and unfortunately, those don't go away!

You posted a while ago about how people used to not want your daughter to come spend the night because, they couldn't handle her, I cannot tell you how much that sounds like my lil sis! She was a crazy kid for sure, but then again, I was too, I think that a lot of that is probably immaturity, and I say that because I was one of those "too smart for their own britches know it alls" when I was that age too, but I grew out of it. My sister is now almost eighteen and about to go to college next year, she's still a bit fiesty at times, but she's come a long way. . . . I promise, there is a light at the end of the tunnel!


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## bat42072 (Mar 8, 2008)

thank you... since we took her off the new med... the school has noticed a big difference in her attitude... so hopefully things are looking up already...


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