# Flash's Place



## Flashy (Nov 16, 2008)

I havenât blogged for a long time on here, but have been blogging elsewhere, just for myself. I miss sharing my buns with people though, and because I am doing some things important to me that I will want to share when they are done, I thought this might be the perfect place; Flashâs Place.

*Flash*[/b] was my world, and all the bunnies I have now are directly, or indirectly, due to me owning and having him.



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I currently have 14 in my motley bunny crew, and 3 fosters who have wormed their way (in one case, literally) into my heart, house and crew. That obviously takes me up to 17. My days are very busy!

Top of my bunny crew is head of the house, *Sky*[/b], Flashâs son.



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Heâs my beautiful boy, or rather, Iâm his girl, and no one elseâs (he has a VERY jealous streak in him). He is proud daddy to the majority of my buns (8 out of my 14), although it did take a while to teach him what to do and how. He is a bun who sometimes get free range at night, and I often wake up to find him snuggled with me, on my chest, or next to me, and thatâs a very nice wake up call, but not at 4am.



*Badger*[/b]



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âInstant Badgerâ is much more of a puppy than a bunny, and is a complete love bug. Wherever I am, he is, in an instant, and thatâs the same for everyone else in the house to, he is just a little less instant. He is very cheeky and gets that definite glint when he knows he is doing something he shouldnât. When he gets free range in my bed at night-time he snuggles down on my duvet and watches friends, occasionally coming over for strokes, and getting my attention by shoving his face and whiskers in my face.



*Sandy*
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Sandy is very much Queen, at least in her head, and was not very pleased with the months of mockery she got for growing back her spay hair in a ridiculous pattern, earning her the nickname âTufty baldyâ. She is mum to 7 of my crew, and earned herself the right to a life of luxury finally (this is her fourth home). She is now spayed and I intend to bond her with somebun at some point, although so far she is refusing all the options given to her. I think she has had enough bunny hassles and wants to relax in peace!



*Star*[/b]



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Star is one of Sandy and Skyâs children and like Sky and Badger, he thinks I am his and no one elses. Starry Arree is not a fan of being held (although he does like the occasional nose rub) but he loves company and when he is out, if Iâm around, he will be found either near my shoulder, or my foot. Heâs our little OCD bunny and is the ultimate tidy guy, and is the cleanest of all clean buns. If he doesnât have his litter tray he puts himself into stasis because he wonât use anything else. Talk about awkward!



*Angel*
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Angel is a spitting image of his granddaddy Flash, although Angel has âtearsâ. He was named after his Angel granddad as opposed to his dad (like everyone else is), because of the uncanny resemblance, right down to the âslipped discâ. He is a hyper, manic maniac and as an intact guy (one of only two intact bunnies here) all he wants to do is run and dig and play and mark and poo and scent and then run some more. Heâs a very affectionate little guy though, when he stands still. One day he will be very willingly (Iâm sure) fathering his own children, Skyâs grandchildren and Flashâs great grandchildren, well, thatâs if everything goes to plan.



*Lightning*[/b]



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Lightning is a mirror of his daddy, sort of, and has very similar traits, but in some ways is very different. He hates being handled (canât blame him because when he was younger he got his little boy bits âmunchedâ and had to have some uncomfortable treatment) and will tell you with a nip, although just recently I have discovered a stroke on the neck is very much enjoyed. He is SO alive and alert and a right pickle. I donât think the world is big enough for Lightning, he will always want to explore more... much like most of my buns actually.



*Dusk*[/b]



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Dusk is a very friendly guy, although not right now (heâs been recently neutered and was not happy about that) and is apparently, claustrophobic and loves his run, spending his nights there, even when itâs cold. He has only started to lick me recently which is so cute, but only when he is marking my nose. I would love to bond him with Sandy, but that all depends on Sandy. He has the potential, to be submissive, but we shall see, I guess.



*Cloud and Candyfloss (Cloudyfloss)*[/b]
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Cloud and Candyfloss are my newest pair and are part of my former quad (the other two being the Dopeys). Cloud is Skyâs oldest son, and Candyfloss is my first rescue, and my newest addition. These two together are a complete handful. Candyfloss is a Houdini and is supremely confident (she was found in a back garden, so she probably escaped from her previous home). Cloud is very anxious and until recently (in fact, until he was bonded specifically with her) that anxiety allowed him to be vicious. Since being with Candyfloss he has started to pick up on her confidence, and whilst he is anxious, he is now not vicious, and can still remember that he loves a cuddle, like he did when he was a babe. Candyfloss is a bit of a bolshie girl, but he can handle his women and is not intimidated. They are like the odd couple, but so far, are working well.



*The Dopeys*[/b]



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The Dopeys are two sisters and are basically one entity, doing the same thing at the same time, and always together, they are also, quite simply, the most stupid rabbits Iâve ever met. They are very dependent on each other and I have every intention of bonding somebun/bunnies with them so that when one dies, the other is not left alone because she definitely wonât cope. There were part of a quad with Cloudyfloss for 6 weeks, until Dopey 2 got spurs and Candyfloss decided she didnât want her around anymore. So now I have to start from scratch bonding the Dopeys with somebuns. They were spayed this week and have done amazingly, after a bit of a dicey start. They are living it up in our living room and are so happy here. They are very peaceful to watch and have a real calming effect. Something else of interest is that they are very vocal bunnies and you can have a conversation with them. They have a wide repertoire of oinks, honks, quacks and more.



*Dawn, Sunny* *and Hope (The Swarming)*[/b][/b]



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The Swarming are exactly that, a swarming. They swarm wherever they are, especially if there is food around. They have been bonded since March and are the last three of Skyâs and Sandyâs children. They are a strange group of buns and they get up to SO many problems. Generally Sunny will find something she wants to do (this normally involves going somewhere she shouldnât) and she will show Dawn who will get her there. She will then go, and he will follow and when she starts to get cautious, he will take over (sort of like he is too stupid to be scared). Once these two have sussed out what is what Sunny will go and get Hope and they will swarm as a group wherever it happens to be they have gone. Dawn is very outgoing and confident and very, very licky. He creates the most problems, but is not the mastermind. Sunny is quite bright and is the mastermind of most trouble. She hates being handled, but is very affectionate when she knows she is in control. Hope is, well, erm, Hope. He is very quiet, not the brightest, a bit ânot all thereâ, and gets very distressed if separated from Dawn and/or Sunny, and together they make up a very good trio. I would love to bond these three with the Dopeys because I think they would be excellent together. This will be my spring project.

So those are my permanent residents. No onto my foster...


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## NZminilops (Nov 16, 2008)

Just wanted to say that I think Sandy is lovely, she's one of the most pretty rabbits I have seen on here :love:. I'm not very good at knowing what to say in blogs but it's great to see pics of your rabbits again.


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## JadeIcing (Nov 16, 2008)

I think you and I should buy a house together. You won't let go of those bunnies and I must have them.


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## Flashy (Nov 16, 2008)

*Foster Trio *(fostered for the RSPCA)

My foster trio all came at separate time, and I bonded them into the trio myself. They all came to me as a mess in one way or another, but things are nicely progressing forwards; with time I shall tell their tales, but not right now.

My foster trio is made up of *Summer*,* Roger* and *Tilly*.


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[align=left]And they can also be found here [ame=http://uk.youtube.com/watch?v=AK21--dswLA]http://uk.youtube.com/watch?v=AK21--dswLA[/ame][/align]

[align=left]They are not currently up for adoption because they are not yet healthy enough (Tilly is still having head tilt treatment and Summer has shared her tapeworm around), but soon they will be. They are going to have to go to a very rabbit savvy owner because they are all very special needs in their own way, and if they don't ever find a home, they will stay with me. They are very much a part of this motley bunny crew already. [/align]


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## TinysMom (Nov 16, 2008)

inkelepht:
:great:​:bambiandthumper​:happyrabbit:


YEAH! Finally - a blog from FLASHY!!!



​


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## Flashy (Nov 16, 2008)

Michelle, I had to cover Sandy's eyes. I don't want her getting an even bigger head, and Ali, I am desperate to move out, so if you buy me a house, I'll move in. You can pay me rent then As a priviledge for living with my crew.

*pats Peg*


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## JadeIcing (Nov 16, 2008)

*Flashy wrote: *


> Ali, I am desperate to move out, so if you buy me a house, I'll move in. You can pay me rent then As a priviledge for living with my crew.




Sounds intresting. Hmm I think it is doable. Do you mind leaving the country? I have several awesome vets.


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## Flashy (Nov 16, 2008)

I'm not too sure the RSPCA would be ok with me stealing their bunnies in that way. You'd have to come here. If you want to enough....


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## JadeIcing (Nov 16, 2008)

*Flashy wrote: *


> I'm not too sure the RSPCA would be ok with me stealing their bunnies in that way. You'd have to come here. If you want to enough....


Hmm have to pass Ringo refuses anymore shots.


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## Flashy (Nov 16, 2008)

Can't say I blame the poor guy.


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## W5Skittles (Nov 16, 2008)

aww your buns are so beautiful... i just want to lay a kiss on their precious little noses :inlove:and your fostor trio are gorgeous! theres no way i could let rabbits go if i fostered would just get to attached :brownbunny


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## JadeIcing (Nov 16, 2008)

He does send love to all your lovely does.


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## SOOOSKA (Nov 16, 2008)

Flashy it's so good to have you back on here. I have missed you and reading all about your babies.

Susan


































Can you tell I'm happy you are back.


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## Flashy (Nov 16, 2008)

I really didn't think anyone other than possibly Polly would be interested/reply. You're all beingvery nice. Thanks


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## polly (Nov 16, 2008)

eeeeeep trace i haven't been in teh blogs for ages and its soo nice to see all your buns again. I know I get an odd pic but i just awwwwwww i think cloud wants to come to scotland and Hercules says hi to his cousins the dopeys :biggrin2:


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## Flashy (Nov 16, 2008)

You can have him if you want him! He comes with free added pinworms


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## polly (Nov 16, 2008)

lmao I don't think the buns would thank me for that


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## Flashy (Nov 17, 2008)

*So this week is a VERY stressful week, rabbit wise. Since about AugustI have been to the vets probably every week for a variety of things, spurs, scabs, spays/neuters, more spurs, seizures, head tilt, post spay complications, erm, and other things I can't remember right now. This coming week, however, we are stepping up a gear and I will be going to the vets four times.*

*Last week angieluv said something to gentle giants about a tape worm. Something in my head clicked and I spoke to angieluv about it. We worked out pretty quickly that my lovely Summer most likely has a tape worm. Last week I took her to see my vet and he has never seen a tapeworm in a bun before and didn't know what to do. I told him what angieluv had said and he took that on board but wanted to clarify with someone if that would be ok, etc. The next day I had to take another rabbit to the vets so Summer came too and. He dosed her and her two bonded friends with a Droncit injection, and now, because Summer has been here for three months and obviously came out of quaratine a long time ago I have to take all my buns, and the cat, to the vets this week, or tape worm injections. And then, I have to take all 17 back 10 days after their first injection, for another injection.*

*I'm hoping that she does have a tapeworm, even though it has caused me chaos because she has been very sickly, and if this sorts it, then that's great. I'm not looking forward to finding a worm though. :shock:*


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## NZminilops (Nov 17, 2008)

I don't know why you think nobody likes you or is interested in what you have to say. You're a thoughtful and considerate and interesting person, plus it helps that you've got so many good looking rabbits to oggle over . 

Ii don't know much about worms but that does sound worrisome, but better for it to be something you know you can get rid of, I guess? Are those the sort of worms that can grow really huge? I'll let you in on a little secret, I has worms once, ugh! The kind cats get, it was NOT fun .

If/when you find the worm, will you take a picture? Morbid curiousity here...

:embarrassed:


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## Flashy (Nov 17, 2008)

Yes. I will take a pic if I find it  She's acting different today, calmer, less eating, so that's good, hopefully. I think you told me about your worms on a previous thread about worms we had, although those were pinworms. I hope these are not something I can catch, although it might help me lose some weight, which would be a good thing, lol. Yup, these are the long ones that sit in the gut. It's all very horrid.


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## Becca (Nov 17, 2008)

*Flashy wrote: *


> I really didn't think anyone other than possibly Polly would be interested/reply. You're all beingvery nice. Thanks


W..wh..haat about me  :bigtears:


:whistling

I love your blog Tracy :bunny24

Your bunnies are gorgeous!!


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## Flashy (Nov 18, 2008)

*So today I did the first shift of rabbits for their Droncit injections. I took hte inside lot (Sky, Badger, Star, Sandy and the Swarming) and much to my surprise Sky and Hope (two buns that don't cope so well with stuff like that) were the least phased and came home to stuff their face. The others just sat huddled in their cages in the corner for a while until they settled.*

*Their weights have not changed much since July, which is great.*

*Sky 1.75kg (down 0.05kg)*

*Sandy 1.5kg (same)*

*Badger 1.5kg (same)*

*Star 1.4kg (up 0.1kg)*

*Dawn 1.3kg (up 0.1 kg)*

*Sunny 1.4kg (same)*

*Hope 1.3kg (down 0.1kg)*

*I struggle most with keeping their weights constant. They get the same amount of food, but it's something I often struggle with. Seems like things in this department are pretty settled though, although I knwo for sure Candyfloss has grown to the size of a small house, so the next batch will be interesting.*


(Edited Hope's weight, I got it wrong!, he does not weight 0.3kg )


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## mouse_chalk (Nov 18, 2008)

YAY! I am SO glad you started a blog!! And I am so glad you're back as well- your presence has definately been missed around here.  :hug:



Also, I LOVE Badger! I just love his cheeky little face! And I love the picture of Star with his paw in his mouth? Looks very Austin Powers lol  (for the life of me can't remember the evil guy I'm thinking of!)

Shoot, I love all your bunnies.... can I have them? Pleeeeeease? :biggrin2:

I hope the tapeworm gets sorted soon.... that sounds like a horrible thing to have to deal with.... and taking all 17 buns to the vets- that's no mean feat! Good luck with it all :hug:


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## BlueGiants (Nov 18, 2008)

Whee! Flashy kids! Thanks for sharing the photo's! So pleased you started a new blog! You have so much to offer!

UGH! Tapeworms in rabbits! Yuck. You have been through so much with the buns!


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## Flashy (Nov 18, 2008)

I have debated long and hard about posting this, and have discussed it heavily with a senior mod, and she helped me edit it a bit and move it around. It's very honest, and not fun reading, so only read it if you are prepared.

_Iâm not sure how to start this, but I want to talk about Flash.

We are coming up to the time of year I spent most of the year wishing it wouldnât come; the anniversary of Flashâs death. This year it will be three years._

_Three years is a long time, and I have grieved hard, and am still grieving hard. _

_I used to be someone who loved Crhistmas. My decorations would go up at the end of November, my room/house would look like a âgrottoâ (according to those who saw it). Christmas is no longer about that for me anymore because it is just a time when I lost my best friend. Deep inside me I still love Christmas and each year find myself getting Christmassy in October and do all my shopping then. Thatâs my only way to enjoy it._

_This is going to be very candid, and is about what happened to me after Flash and also when I had him, and mentions sensitive stuff. I have not ever really properly opened up about any of this, but right now for me it is very relevant because of the time of year, and the fact that soon I want to share my special boy with you all._

_Flash came into my life when I really needed someone. My mental health was deteriorating severely and I was barely coping. Flash came to me at a time when I was in and out of hospital, when life was very dire for me. He was the first ever being to be there. Most people, even now, expect me to be a source of support, or the life and soul of any party, loud, gobby, funny, a general extrovert, when actually, inside, thatâs not really how I feel, itâs a front for the world, Iâm depressed, anxious, scared and many other things my outward persona does not portray. Flash was the first being to not care if I was laughing, crying, suicidal, playing, cuddling, bored, sleeping, he was there no matter what. He wanted nothing in return, other than for me to look after him, and he gave himself to me completely. He was an active guy yet was never very far from me. If I was crying or being âstupidâ he would be there. He was so in tune with my moods he knew what I needed better than me. I had a horrific summer that year, I was reported missing, had police searching for me, landed myself in hospital more times than I can count and each time, he was still there, still loved me, didnât shout, didnât cry, just there, as my friend._

_When he died, things got worse. Within the space of a few weeks of his death I lost my house, my job, my therapist, my best human friend, my doctor, and any shred of hope or want to live. I gave up. I got very severely ill and was sectioned. At the point of sectioning I had done myself so much damage my heart was giving up and I was genuinely happy and proud of myself for being so close to death. The doctors said I should have been dead, and they couldnât understand how I wasnât. After they released me off my section I was no better mentally and headed straight down again. That year I planned to take my life on the anniversary of his death, but I couldnât do it. My family have gone through so much and Christmas is not the right time to do that. I carried on, day to day, worming my way closer to death. Then Moon died. Moon, one of the two buns that got me through Flashâs death, Flashâs daughter, and she died due to my absolute stupidity and that of the vets. I went for it in an even greater way then. The doctors, once again, told me I should be dead, and should be, at the very least, unconscious. I refused to be sectioned this time, so just had whatever treatment I needed (physically). _

_Shortly after that, I found RO, and started to REALLY learn. And boy did I learn. Shortly after I was blessed with 7 Dinkies (Angel, Star, Sunny, Lightning, Hope, Dusk and Dawn), and that took our total at the time up to 15. I am not well enough to work, and taking care of my buns is my reason to get up, and more buns I have, the more responsibility I have, and the less I can die. No one in my house has enough time, or want, to look after them to a good enough standard. If I die now I either have to take them with me, which they donât deserve, or they go to be rehomed, which they donât deserve either. They deserve a life here, a lovely life here, and I give them that._

_I have two parts to me now. I have this part that will probably always grieve for Flash, that will always plan to take my life on his date, that will always blame me for him dying, and I have this other part. This other part is me. I donât want to grieve for him anymore. I donât want to cry over him. I want to remember him and laugh, remember the things he did, not suffer from flashbacks or anything._

_The other night I had a dream about him. I canât remember it all, but the general gist was that it was real time (as in I hadnât seen him for nearly 3 years), and he still felt the same as before and acted the same as before, which really surprised me. When I was holding him I knew he had been there all the time, and whilst I had been looking after him, I didnât know it and hadnât seen him, and was only seeing him for the first time in a long time that day. It was very much the clichÃ©d thing that he is still here even though he has gone. I woke up that morning feeling quite peaceful because I knew that even though I hadnât seen him, he was still there and would keep showing himself to me every so often (he has done this all the way through)._

_It was after that that I felt able to face his videos; those we took of him. I have not looked at these videos for three years, and had no inclination to, but this week I have spent ages getting them all only disc so that I can introduce him to you all, as he was in his original form, the games, the expressions, the love, the lot._

_Heâs always in my mind at the moment. _

_Peg made a post on one of Beccaâs threads about looking for something by getting new buns, and it made me think. I have so many, is that what I do? And itâs not. Itâs the opposite. Me and Flash were joined, one entity, and I never ever want to go through what I went through with losing someone that was such a deep part of me. When he died, I leaned on Sky and Moon, and when Moon died I broke all over again (although I was only ever fragile with how fixed I was). Now I have a whole clutch, and with the exception of Sky, I could cope without them all. Yes, I would be sad, but I would not be as desolate as I was without Flash. The more bunnies I have, the less pain I will feel when they eventually leave me._

_When Moon died I switched off. At the best of times my illness prevents me from feeling emotions like a regular person, but now I barely feel them at all. I stopped loving because it hurt too much. I have stayed that way, although every now and then I get a rush of affection for somebunny, but it hurts less now, things hurt less, and thatâs what I need. I never ever want to go through what I did with Flash, again._

_My rabbits are my reason to live, and the more I have, the more reasons I have to live. Thatâs another reason why I have so many. Thatâs not to say Iâm not suicidal, because part of me is, but that is part of me that is caused largely by my illness (I call it âmy brainâ and it is due to dissociation, which means I lose the conscious power of thought and the subconscious takes over), I, as a person, am not, because I have a lot to keep me here, even if I donât want to be all the time. Once again my brain __has tried to tell me__ to take my life again this Christmas, but I also know that I canât, even though last year I came close. I know that I can make a difference in this world. And why can I make a difference? Because of what Flash and Moon went through. I have learnt so much due to what they went through. Iâm still seriously ill, but I can still do good things, make a difference, help bunnies, educate people, and I do._

_I volunteer a lot with the RSPCA now. I do home visits for anyone wanting to adopt a bun, I have written an adoption pack (with articles about how to bond bunnies, litter train, weather proof, rabbit proof, etc), I foster (as you have seen), I train people up so they know what to look for with buns (including other volunteers, as well as RSPCA staff), I have bonded peopleâs buns when they couldnât do it themselves and even more. _

_Iâm moving forward, and I donât want to grieve for Flash anymore. I want to remember him full of life. I want to share him with people. I want people to see why it is I want a part of him with me all the time, why I want his genes carried on, why he meant so much to me, why he was so very special. _

_Sorry for all that, itâs just here in my head because Flash is so predominant for me at the moment and because as December draws nearer I lose the limited capabilities I have for rational thought._

_Flash died aged 9 months 15 days. He lived with me for 7 months 19 days. In that short time he changed my life, and right now, his legacy is living on, and allowing me to change the lives of other buns, find them homes, educate them, help them, make other buns happy. One day I want Flash's legacy to be more real and to have a real 'Flash's Place' for needy buns (like Tilly, like Summer). All because of one little guy. He was the butterfly fluttering on one side of a world, creating a tsunami over the other side of the world. His life has made waves and will keep making them, for as long as any bun influenced by his life, is alive._

_My Angel  I'm so proud of him, and so very blessed to have had him, and am now very blessed to have his relatives living here, and so happy._


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## NorthernAutumn (Nov 18, 2008)

:hug: That was good of you to share that with us, Tracy.
I appreciate how deeply you feel about Flashy. I am glad he was with you when you needed him most. 

_"Flash died aged 9 months 15 days. He lived with me for 7 months 19 days. In that short time he changed my life, and right now, his legacy is living on, and allowing me to change the lives of other buns, find them homes, educate them, help them, make other buns happy. One day I want Flash's legacy to be more real and to have a real 'Flash's Place' for needy buns (like Tilly, like Summer). All because of one little guy. He was the butterfly fluttering on one side of a world, creating a tsunami over the other side of the world. His life has made waves and will keep making them, for as long as any bun influenced by his life, is alive."

_I hope that you see that your hard work with buns is changing their lives for the better, and maybe even giving someone else their own little Flashy who will get them through their darkest nights (like he did with you).

I am happy you are getting better, mentally and emotionally.We need a live Tracy, full of knowledge, ironic bunny jokes, and wisdom here on RO, and in the real world. You are a very special gift to Bunnies; you are the best friend any bunny could have. 
If my mom were writing, she would say: "Tracy, your future was written in the stars the day you were born. Embrace it, and go forward, carrying the good memories of the past." You are doing just that with all of your good work 

Mind you, us peoples really like you too, Tracy:nod. I am so glad that you were able to help Becca through the kindling, on the other side of the world from most ppl on RO. I don't know what would have happened if it wasn't for your cool head, and willingness to help... It makes me feel happy to know that there is someone (you!) far off in Britain who is doing her best for rabbits. I may never meet you, but the fact that you are there makes me happy; kinda like knowing that panda bears exist (just makes me feel good  )


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## MissBinky (Nov 18, 2008)

You know Tracy, we had a falling out a bit ago, but that's what it was at the most. The whole time you were away, I missed you. I never got around... No, not true. I never got over being a coward to actually come up to talk to you since you've come back and tell you how much I appreciated the advice you had given me back then. We are two different people, and no, I don't know you, so I won't even pretend to know anything about you really. However, to a certain extent,I understand what it feels like when everyday is a struggle. I know how it is to have to fight yourself and that it's a battle that takes more strength than anyone can understand. Anyway, I guess what I wanted to say is, you're wrong to think that you'd go unnoticed whether present or absent. We notice. I've noticed. And you were missed. I'm glad you came back. And though nothing can bring Flash back, you're honouring him everyday by doing what you do. And if you were to stop, there'd be a heck of a lot of buns mourning.


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## Flashy (Nov 18, 2008)

Thank you for the replies  It's hard to say some of those things, but equally, it's part of his story, a very large part.

Autumn, thank you for the lovely reply. I must admit, some of it made me laugh, not in a nasty way, but like the bit about the panda, that tickled me, but I understand what you mean, not sure why that is the case, but I can see that you mean what you say 

I have to be honest MissBinky, I have absolutely no recollection of that at all, and I am very accurate when I remember 'issues' like that, so all I can guess from that is that that is yet another time when I was having a blank of time and it was not actually me, it was, what I call 'my brain', which basically takes over as and when it feels like it. 

In terms of people not missing me, it wouldn't matter a great deal to anyone really on here (with the possible exception of Polly) because when I'm not around, I don't talk to anyone from here, so it's not like it would be any different from that. Polly was the only person I kept speaking to whilst not here. That's not like a wallowy thing, just a fact, because, at the end of the day this is the internet and the internet often works on an 'in sight in mind' theory.


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## TinysMom (Nov 18, 2008)

Flashy - I'm just now reading what you wrote a bit ago - and I'm sitting here with tears streaming down my cheeks. I wish you were here so we could have some tea (or tequila or something) - and just cry together over our losses.

I can understand a bit of your pain and loss - but honestly - not much. 

When we got Tiny & Tio & Kyo - I had basically been almost "nonfunctional" for months. I would make supper and do dishes and laundry...but I was like a robot....moving about doing things but I had no heart or soul. To say I was in a depression was a major understatement. 

The rabbits brought me out of myself. I could spend laying on the floor (even napping) and let them get used to me as a jungle gym...and just be this zombified person who didn't handle life. Truly - there were many times I wanted to just die...but was too afraid to try anything.

Tiny and the tweebs healed me....I swear they did. I loved them - and I loved Ginger and Sugar - but when we got Puck...its like our family started healing and laughing together. I started becoming functional...

When Ginger died - I literally went back to my non-functional state. Looking back now, I can see where Tiny tried to pull me out of it - but I didn't want to be pulled out...I didn't want to face life without her. For the last few months of her life...she'd needed me hours every day - to feed her - give her little baths with a damp washcloth - love on her - etc. 

As I pulled out of it though - Tiny and I bonded....and I started feeling good about myself and about life.

When I lost Tiny- I truly came very close to giving up. In fact, three times I almost tried...and three times I was interrupted by someone. (Finally I gave up and threw the pills away).

I say all this to say - in some small measure - I have walked in your shoes. I have also lost....and I can understand some of the pain. To be honest wtih you - I think sometimes the pain is still there - chasing after me - but I try to not give in.

I understand how having more bunnies keeps it from hurting so bad. Sometimes when we've lost a bunny lately - I've been so numb that I try to shrug it off and move on. I can't continue to hurt this bad...I just can't. I think the human body can only take so much.

So why am I sharing this here - on your thread? Am I trying to hijack it?

Not at all....nor am I trying to minimize what you've gone through and what you've experienced.

I simply want to say - that while our experiences have been different - in some areas - they have parts of "sameness" ....and I am here for you.

We've walked different paths - but at times I think they've been parallel. Sometimes I'm strong - many many times - I'm weak. 

But I'm here and I care about you....and I want you to know it.

I'm looking forward to seeing more of Flash...of seeing how special he was. 

By the way - I actually came in here - to ask you if you'd post the picture of showing the rabbit how to breed.....I love that photo!

Thanks for sharing what you wrote - it really made me cry -but in a way they were tears of healing and surrender...of the hope that I too will continue to heal from the pain of Tiny's passing.

I've always felt like Tiny was the only one who loved me unconditionally....and he loved me and was loving even when I was hateful.

Isn't it wonderful how loving rabbits can be?


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## NZminilops (Nov 18, 2008)

I need my glasses before I attempt to read the new long posts in here (I have double vision so have trouble with long blocks of writing), but just wanted to say your buns are much bigger than I imagined. Sakura is around 1.2kg and I thought she was a little large haha! I guess she's really sort of puny .

You've got a sharp memory, I don't even remember writing about having worms on here. It was very gross and at the time I didn't know about worms, I thought I had some weird aliens in me, and that I was dying. Took me days to tell my mum. I did lose weight too but it was all from water the doctor said at the time.

I did skim your posts and I know what you mean about the out of sight, out of mind thing, as I'm sure if I disapeared off here nobody would notice. But some people you do think of and remember even if you never seemed to take much notice of them when they were around. I'm glad that you and Polly have a good friendship going on though, it's great when people can come together with a common love for something and form friendships from it.


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## Flashy (Nov 18, 2008)

Peg, I'm so glad you got rid of those pills. It is SO hard to die from an overdose, normally all that happens is that you feel vile and are sick, or you might end up with liver/kidney/heart damage depending on the tablets, and you might die a very slow and painful death. I'm just very glad you didn't do it  the only way to go through grief, as you probably now know, is one moment at a time (be that a week, day, hour, minute) and deal with that. 

Puck sounds like an amazing guy, and then to lose the bun who supported you through those times (Tiny) is a double blow, the whole 'kick you when you're down thing' and that can suck so bad. I sort of want to say that I hope things are feeling better for you, but I also know that really, its a relatively short time since you lost them and it probably doesn't feel better, just comes and goes.

You do know that if you ever want a chat I'm always happy to listen right? I hope you do know that because I'd hate to think that you didn't.

Michelle, you don't have to read the essay, lol, that's ok. 

Flash was a throw back and was bigger than a nethie, plus racey too, and so his offspring have ended up bigger, plus we used big does too. Sakura is big for a nethie, but then mine are giants compared to what theirgenes say they should be More bunny to love!

Yeh, I read that thread over and over (about pinworms) so it stuck in my brain, and this is the thread http://www.rabbitsonline.net/view_topic.php?id=28704&forum_id=16&page=2and this is what you said, lol. 



> I suddenly wondered, can humans get pinworms? I caught worms off a cat years ago, NOT pretty!



So there you go, lol.

And yes, the internet is a fickle place. Mind you though, when you weren't around I wondered how you were, how the bunners were, wondered if I had upset you because you never replied to my last e-mail, so you're right in what you say I guess.

Polly is great. I'm so lucky she's my friend  She has REALLY taken some stick from me over time but has still stuck by me. Only one other friend has ever done that. She's ace


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## Becca (Nov 18, 2008)

Tracy, Well I'm not going to say it on here, I've just said it on msn..

Bestest RO Friend  :hug:


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## polly (Nov 18, 2008)

Hey Trace, just want ya to know you are one of my best friends meeting you through the summer just cemented that (even if it wasn't a long visit) Iwill always be there for you just as you are always there for me :hug::hug2::hugsquish:


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## JadeIcing (Nov 18, 2008)

I read everything you said and I understand. More than most know. I have struggled my whole life with depression. I have so many times wanted to end it. Been so close but for one reason or other haven't. 

I have lost many pets over the years but not one that means to me what Flash means to you.Samantha was so much to me but I know Connor is my world. I love them all. They all have my heart but he is my baby. I got him when he was 5wks old he will be 3 on the 23rd. He was so tiny...Shortly after I got him I spent many days bed ridden with migraines from stress. Rob would set him up on the bed with food, litter, water. The whole 9yrds. When we did go out he went with me. In my purse...he got into many stores and restaurants. If I lost him...I could see myself fallingto where youwent. My heart goes out to you because honestly that kind of lossterrifies me. 

I talked to you here and there in PMs and on MSN. I am one not to push. I know what it is like to have someone push when you don't want them to. I know what it is like to want to jam something in their mouth and down their throat to shut them up. 

Ever need to talk, I am here. 

Ali


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## Flashy (Nov 19, 2008)

[align=left]I'm quite annoyed and upset right now.

As I've said, I do a lot of stuff with the RSPCA, mainly home visits, but other stuff too.

Back in May a lady adopted a beautiful neutered dutch buy called Houdini to bond with her spayed lady.







When I went back three months later it was clear that this bunny was full of hormones.

I had a good look at Houdini and found this.






He is incredibly deformed. He seems to have a split down where he scent glands should be. From his behaviour I would guess his balls are undescended and somehow the deformity has affected them too.

So back I go to the RSPCA explained that he was probably not neutered etc. The RSPCA had missed the fact he was deformed, had missed all his hormonal behaviour (and there was a lot!). They tried to sort the situation, and they were going to pay for the vets to neuter him, however, the vets are not rabbit savvy and after doing a blood test that they found as inconclusive they think it's not worth the risk of the surgery, and the RSPCA have agreed. This rabbit is not neutered, the lady has to keep separating her buns because one is humping the other ALL the time, he is at higher risk of testicular cancer, and I am so frustrated that they are allowing this to happen. I offered to take this bun to my rabbit savvy vet, to look after it through recovery, to do whatever I need to, and they have no reached this decision.

Both of these buns are a mess, one because she is annoyed with the constant humping, chasing, spraying, and the other because he is so hormonal.

Sometimes I hate what I do.


I've left spaces for pictures because I can't figure out how to get them from Photobucket today, and I don't have the patience to try.
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## Flashy (Nov 19, 2008)

I also just wanted to add that you've all been so nice, thank you 

Ali, just wanted to say that please don't think you will end up suicidal if you lose him because you might think yourself into it and it could end up worse than the grief might have been. Just try to enjoy each day as it comes and not focus on what happens when he dies. We are all stronger than we think.


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## BlueGiants (Nov 19, 2008)

Dealing with a bureaucracy (*and yeah, the RSPCA is a bureaucracy!) is tough. They don't see things from the same perspective you do. Have patience. Can you go higher up? Explain how this woman is at risk of losing him to deformity related issues and her to aggression issues (I can only imagine how stressed out the poor doe is getting!)

Can you put it in a letter? Sometimes putting it in writing helps make the point. It is frustrating, but please don't give up. (For the sake of the bunnies!) What you're doing is wonderful! :hug:


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## Wabbitdad12 (Nov 19, 2008)

*TinysMom wrote: *


> inkelepht:
> :great:​
> 
> :bambiandthumper​
> ...


Ditto!


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## Wabbitdad12 (Nov 19, 2008)

First your bunny's are beautiful!

I am glad your back!inkbouce: You were one of the first people I met when I found this forum and I remember chatting with you during my lunch hour.

You have and I am sure will give me good advice on caring for my buns.


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## Flashy (Nov 19, 2008)

I just wanted to give abasic explanationof my illnesses. This is due to something someone said yesterday, not anything said in this thread or anything.

My diagnosis is is Emotionally Unstable Personality Disorder, that's what the UK call it, but other places call it Borderline Personality Disorder. That is my main diagnosis, but I also have what is apparently severe Seasonal Affective Disorder and anxiety problems, but the BPD umbrella covers most of the problems though. 

I have been deemed too complex to help by the mental health professionals and then discharged, so have had to find my own way and own strategies. I have no professional help at all, no doctors, psychs, CPNs, social workers or anyone else who works with the people who have mental health problems over here. I have just myself and my buns, although when I'm really bad my parents have to help. I have, however,just been registered disabled due to what happens for me.

I am much more functional than I was, which is down to my own sheer determination and my buns. I am likely to be ill forever, because it's not me and I have an illness, like most people who have illnessesmy illness is myself, so I can't get away from it, my very being is the illness,however, with time and more effort, I would like to think I will be able to function, hold down a job, get a house, and be functional.

I did write something a bit more indepth but decided against posting it, but if anyone else has some questions, just ask  I'm happy to answer, if not here, then in PM.


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## Flashy (Nov 19, 2008)

*Ok, so onto happier things.*

*Lightning*

*I went to clean out Lightning this morning and discovered he had made the most cute nest. Not bad for a fully intact male. :biggrin2:*


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*I then took some more pics because he was being a bit super cute today.*


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*Then I gave him the remnants of the food that was left in the bag. He liked that a little.*


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*Then he went to sleep by his food bowl. Strange guy.*


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*Angel*

*Once I had my camera out I just had to take some more pics.*

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*I was mid cleaning Angel out at this point, and got distracted by Dusk, and then turn around to find that someone was most definitely waiting for me.*

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*This is when his hutchs and run were all cleaned and he got fresh toys (they smelt ultra bad though because they had been in with Lightning).*

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*Dusk*

*It was this racket made by Dusk that distracted me from Angel. He was being stroppy that he wasn't getting enough attention. This is a far cry from the bun who was really depressed last week. It's good when you see them back to normal *


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## BlueGiants (Nov 19, 2008)

Oh my! They are beautiful! Such gorgeous markings! I love the sweet little lines above their eyebrows... too cute. Was Angel chinning his toys cause they had been in with Lightening? LOL! Trying to make them smell better? :biggrin2:


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## Flashy (Nov 19, 2008)

lol, yeh, he was making them smell much better 

Flash got his name due to his eye brow markings, he had a bolt of Lightning (sort of like Harry Potter) so he ended up Flash of Lightning. I just love their little faces


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## Flashy (Nov 19, 2008)

*Ok, now some more.*

*Dopeys*

*The Dopeys have been inside for a while due to their spay and are VERY miffed at being back outside. Can you tell?*

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*Cloudyfloss*

*Even more disapproving than the Dopeys are Cloudyfloss, not sure why though. These are also the first pics of this fresh pair.*

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*This ones cute.*

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*Cloud*

*Look at his little face.*

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*Candyfloss*

*Who is just worried about food.*

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## Flashy (Nov 19, 2008)

*Badger

Let's play 'spot the Badger' (you might struggle on the first one though because the pic is small). Also, just to say that at the moment we have to empty some of the rooms in our house, and so all the crud is being piled up in the spare room, its not normally that awful!

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*This cheeky tike thought me getting hay was the perfect gettaway time, and here is him sheepishly being herded back in to his area.

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*

The Fosters

Finally the fosters.

I mentioned on another thread about Summer dunking her dewlap and it gets soaking. This shows her wet dewlap and where it is.

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*I had some help whilst trying to clean them out today. Roger was being more sociable than normal.

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*Waiting for breakfast.

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*Getting breakfast!

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*Still no worm, or that I have found at any rate. I thought I had found a bit today and got excited only to find it was a weird piece of hay. Oops. 

Did some physio with Tilly today, for the first time in a few days. She has retained her neck movement and has not gone backwards which is good. She can turn her head round the other way so that shows she has the capability there, to a certain extent. She also enjoys her massages and chunters her teeth at those.

Ok, so those are my updates for today.

Oh, and those that had their Droncit yesterday all seem fine today 
*


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## polly (Nov 19, 2008)

um well my fave is .... all of them :biggrin2::biggrin2::biggrin2:I will need to plan another visit for badgey cuddles


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## Flashy (Nov 19, 2008)

Yeh! Doooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo! Although really its my turn to come to you, but I'm not bringing him all that way, lol. Mind you, couldn't bring myself all that way.


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## BSAR (Nov 20, 2008)

Great blog! I love all your buns!! I would gladly take Summer if I could and if I were closer! she is just gorgeous! I can't believe that you kept all of those babies! You must really love them!


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## Flashy (Nov 20, 2008)

[align=center]*I give you My Guy.*[/align]
[align=center]*Flash's Video Collection. *[/align]
[align=center][flash=320,256]http://uk.youtube.com/v/GGgckhYV2pg[/flash]

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[align=center]*Ihope this does him justice.*[/align]


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## Flashy (Nov 20, 2008)

It's a bit of a pain with the buffering though, sorry.


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## JadeIcing (Nov 20, 2008)

*Flashy wrote: *


> I also just wanted to add that you've all been so nice, thank you
> 
> Ali, just wanted to say that please don't think you will end up suicidal if you lose him because you might think yourself into it and it could end up worse than the grief might have been. Just try to enjoy each day as it comes and not focus on what happens when he dies. We are all stronger than we think.


I have fought hard in life not to be there I have a time to for other reasons but I know it will be hard. As long as I have the others they need me.


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## JadeIcing (Nov 20, 2008)

*Flashy wrote: *


> My diagnosis is is Emotionally Unstable Personality Disorder, that's what the UK call it, but other places call it Borderline Personality Disorder. That is my main diagnosis, but I also have what is apparently severe Seasonal Affective Disorder and anxiety problems, but the BPD umbrella covers most of the problems though.




That is one of many things my brother has.Alongwith Bipolar;ADHA; and a few others.I am not diagnoised because I refuse to. I just won't I have fought it with out help and I will keep on. 

http://www.nami.orgMy mom is on the board of directors for her chapter. They both (her and my brother) very active with it. I just found out there is a chapter that meets near here. I think I might start going once work slows down.


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## JadeIcing (Nov 20, 2008)

I love the pics of them with the hay! Awesome.


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## TinysMom (Nov 20, 2008)

What an awesome video (I really need to have you do something for Tiny)....you really captured so much of him.

I sat here in tears because you made him come so "alive" for me - its like I could see some of his uniqueness - in the way he let you hold him and the way he interacted with you.

He reminds me so much of our Puck - not in looks - but in the personality and his relationship to you. I understand now why Art loved Puck so very very much and why Puck was so special to him. (I loved Puck too but sometimes saw him as a pest because he was so much like a puppy..).

I loved the video...thanks for sharing it.


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## BlueGiants (Nov 20, 2008)

Oh Tracey... that is magnificent! What a touching and sweet tribute to him. (And you have such a talent for editing !!!) I got such a feeling for his personality. No wonder you were so close to him! He will be with you always...

You are so kind to share him with us. Thank you very much!


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## NorthernAutumn (Nov 20, 2008)

Wow!

That was a fantastic vid! I'm alternately laughing and crying... What a wonderful guy Flash was; he obviously loved you so very much. He stuck right with you, playing with you even...

This is inspiring me to make a video of my guys really soon.I want something like your video to remember them with (in case of the inevitable :?) Thank you so much for sharing your film with us, Tracy.

BTW: That was really neat to actually see you! I guess I always think that people will resemble their avatar, so I think of them in terms of the colours or fonts they've used instead of imagining their faces... You iz pretty


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## Flashy (Nov 21, 2008)

Thank you  I'm very happy with it although there was one bit I couldn't find, where he was running with the ball with no help from me and my brother. I can't watch it though, lol, because I just sob my heart out. I was a bit of a robot making it and now it's done its too much.

I have watched it though and it shows me how close we did get during that time. And it also shows the progression because you have where he isn't keen on being held, where he will sit with me but doesn't like strokes, where he comes to me, and when he sits on my lap by choice.

The hide and seek bit was so funny to film because I hid firstly behind a curtain and he got his separation anxiety thing and was looking for me (something his children later inherited), and then when I called his name he came straight to where I was. When I moved elsewhere to hide he would keep going back there first, sure I would be there, he would also stare out the window (something Sky used to also do), and the bit you see here is when he started to look sad and confused, and then when I called him he came running as fast as he could (only to find me and spray me).

I don't think I'll ever love anyone like him (because I never intend to have children or force a guy to be my hubby or anything) so he was the most precious thing I've had the fortune to have in my life.

As for me, lol, I'm in various states of dress and readiness in that, lol, in my PJs at one point, or dressed with no makeup or hair done, but most commonly dressed with full slap on. 

It tells the full story of his life, with his first picture and last picture (well, not actually the last picture because that was accidently deleted shortly after he died), and it's a comfort. I love the songs, and that's the only part I can tolerate, lol.

I'm making another couple of videos currently, one of the fosters, and I've started planning one of Sky and Moon full of baby cuteness. I have also been asked to do videos for the RSPCA for those longer residents who need homes. They keep me busy but they are so rewarding when they are done and finished and you are happy with them 

Thank you very much for seeing my guy as he was.

x


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## Flashy (Nov 21, 2008)

*The Foster Trio*

*We started our day very nicely today, with the usual daily trip to the vets (well, that's how its been this week).*

*He said he could finally see a visible difference in Tilly and how active she was, and he was amazingly chuffed. We have been using Convenia with her, and been gradually cutting the timeframe down, so we now give it weekly, and that seems to work perfectly for her. She is doing so well, her movement is infinitely better than it was when she came and we never have any rolling anymore. She jumps and leaps, and runs, and she leaps over things, and turns her head the other way and whilst she will always have a residual tilt, she is doing amazing. I was really chuffed with how pleased my vet was. Last week he said if she keeps tilting over we will stop the injections, but this week he said he can see the visible difference and we will keep doing weekly injections, which is fantastic.*

*We then talked about Summer. He agrees that the changes we are seeing in her indicate she has had a worm and that it is no longer a problem for her. He said that the worm probably has died and been digested. We have only seen symptoms from her recently so possibly its not very big (I told him to shh when he told me it could be 2 ft long).*

*I finally feel like those three are headed in the right direction. *

*Now I wait to see what happens next (and I already have a shrewd idea given what I saw from one of my buns this morning).*

*I made a post the other day about Summer and her dewlap dunking. I was watching her the other day and she reaches her head right in which is how it gets wet, so I have gone out and bought an aray of small dishes/pots/containers that she might be able to drink from and that would be too small for her to drink and for her dewlap to go in. Fingers crossed something will work. If it does, it will all be very ridiculous and I give everyone permission to laugh *


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## JadeIcing (Nov 21, 2008)

I love hearing about your foster trio. I think they may have to be adopted to the USA.


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## SOOOSKA (Nov 21, 2008)

Tracey what a great video. Can you ever tell how much you love and care for your pets. 

Also you are such a Pretty Young Lady.

Susan


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## Flashy (Nov 21, 2008)

You know what Ali, if you lived in the UK and seriously wanted them I woul be so happy for them to live with such a great owner, but you live in the stupid States.*shakes fist at you*

Thanks Susan  I find it sonice and warming when people say things like that about me and my buns. The other day at the vets the nurse told me she likes it whenever my bunnies came in because they came to the front of the cages and wanted attention unlike most other buns they get inand she said she could tell they were really well looked over and well socialised, which put my oncloud 9 for the rest of the day. 

I look a bitdifferent from that now, different hair and lost some weight, but thanks  Peopleoften tell me that but Ican't so it, so just have to believe that that's what you believe if that makes sense, lol.


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## JadeIcing (Nov 21, 2008)

*Flashy wrote: *


> You know what Ali, if you lived in the UK and seriously wanted them I woul be so happy for them to live with such a great owner, but you live in the stupid States.*shakes fist at you*


I think we need to figure how to push our countries together. That was I could just go for a drive and pick them up.


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## Flashy (Nov 21, 2008)

That's going to be one rather large thinking cap we need then


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## Flashy (Nov 21, 2008)

*I was just writing a response to Teeny's passing, and remember what happened last night.

In our garden we have solar lights. They work only in the summer. We have some spread around the garden, and one on Flash's grave. The one on Flash's grave, well, flashes. It flashes like a heartbeat. It is one of the ways that I know he is still here, because no matter what light we put there, they all do it.

The light have no been on for a good while because there is not enough sun, and they were not on last night.

In the middle of the night, about 3am, I looked out my window and Flash's light is flashing. Not in its normal heartbeat way, but in a very frantic manner. I really felt like he wanted me to see it, like it was really a 'mum mum, I saw it, you've done it, and it's wonderful'. Reading too much into it? Maybe, but those lights haven't been on for ages, and weren't on when I went to be, and yesterday I uploaded his video, the first one ever about him. I just feel like he was communicating with me, and that he knew. I may have got the meaning wrong, but there was definite communication.
*


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## Flashy (Nov 21, 2008)

*Hope has a watery eye. He has spurs back in September, and I'm hoping it's not related.

The way I see it there are a few possibilities

~Something in the eye (it does look a little red).

~Something happened to the eye (like a scratch or something).

~Reaction to the Droncit jab.

~Spurs.

He is eating and acting fine, and the discharge is clear, it's just watery. So here we go again, bathing it. He has the vets next Friday so I can ask him to check it.

I'm waiting for things to stay positive 

I did just post a *quickie *in the Infirmary though because I just want to check that it would be white discharge if it was related to reoccuring molar issues.
*


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## Flashy (Nov 22, 2008)

[align=center]*3 Fosters and some food*[/align]
[align=center][flash=320,256]http://uk.youtube.com/v/GBUOnEMQeAs[/flash]
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## JadeIcing (Nov 22, 2008)

They like food. :biggrin2:


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## Flashy (Nov 22, 2008)

Ha ha, that might be understatement of the century


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## polly (Nov 22, 2008)

Great videos Trace I can see a big difference in Tilly now . The one of flash is beautiful


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## Flashy (Nov 22, 2008)

*Not much to report today. *

*Just Hope's eye really. I bathed it last night and this morning, and by mid afternoon it had not run since the morning and was completely dry, so I can only presume that he had something in it and I got it out. I will continue to bathe it for a few days though just to make sure, but it doesn't appear to be something too major, which is a huge relief.*

*The outside buns have done well today and have mostly stayed in the warmer places (apart from, well obviously, the Dopeys who sat in the coldest part until I covered them up). The foster swarming are really sheltered in their new area which is great because they are the ones I'm most concerned about, but right now they are right outside the patio doors and I can see them all the time (and I was so interested in what they were doing at one point I forgot I was the other side of the glass and did my best to put my head through the glass. Oops).*


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## NorthernAutumn (Nov 22, 2008)

I love the Dopeys' name Tracy... It make me giggle every time I read it:biggrin2:


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## Flashy (Nov 22, 2008)

They have real names too, lol. Really they are Pogo (Dopey 1)and Polo (Dopey 2)but are only ever called that at the vets. They ended up with a collective name because it's really hard to tell them apart (I'm the only one who can). They are not the brightest and have fallen into bin bags, out of hutches, all sorts of places, and they just don't learn. Right now you open their hutch and out they pop across the patio. We are quite good at Dopey catching.

They have a range of nicknames that go alongside Dopey 1 and Dopey 2. Dopey 1 is also known as Evil Dopey, and Dopey 2 ended up as Nevil Dopey (which was a shortened version of Newly Evil Dopey).

They are not just very bright. Very friendly, and lovely buns, just not bright


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## Flashy (Nov 23, 2008)

[align=center]*Sky and Moon as babies*[/align]
[align=center][flash=320,256]http://uk.youtube.com/v/RjmCgN468mQ[/flash][/align]
*What I will warn you is that there is no music this time, and I have left the speech on it. This means you will hear my rabbit voice! Also, my mum and brother are there and me and my bro, at this point, sounded pretty identical. I'm not having conversations with myself, I promise.*


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## Flashy (Nov 23, 2008)

*Ooooooh those Fosters are so turdy.*

*This morning when I went out to give them breakfast they all came over and Roger and Tilly just looked and went away, but Summer did sit and eat.*

*I was aware it was not normal, and so given the cold weather decided to test what they would eat, so I threw some pellets around a bit, and then also gave them two carrots complete with carrot tops. They all sit and munch their way through that.*

*Go back a while ago, still not eaten the pellets in the bowl. I needed to change the food bowl over to the water bowl (and then put it on bricks, as my 5th effort to stop Summer dewlap dunking), and give them back their old food bowl. So I sort all that out, put the pellets in the bowl and put it in and all three come racing over to stuff their faces. Why wouldn't they eat before? Because the bowl was slightly damp from the snow that had blown in, and so the pellets got damp. What spoilt brats!*


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## Flashy (Nov 24, 2008)

*Today the fosters went for their second Droncit injection. The vet was really impressed with Tilly's lessened tilt. He was also very impressed when I told him that for the first time ever, today I saw her use one of her ears turned to listen to something. Normally her ears just flop over on the side she tilts on, but the fact she used it was a huge thing.*

*Also, Summer's went patch seems to be drying, so apparently a water bowl high up works for her, which is great, and a relief. Tilly and Roger can drink from it too which is great.*

*We also discussed routinely treating any new bun coming into mine for tapeworm to avoid a repeat of this.*


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## Flashy (Nov 24, 2008)

*Due to some work we are having done all the house all of my buns (7)have been moved out of my room and to various places around the house. It's VERY lonely in here now. The last time my room was empty was after Moon died, so it's weird. Although, I think I will enjoy the peace and quiet! Mum said I can always go and sleep in the living room if it's too quiet in my room, lol, that's where 5 of the 7 are, including my Guy Sky.*


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## Flashy (Nov 28, 2008)

*So, haven't updated for a few days. They've been very hectic few days, with plumbers around and rabbits scattered in various appallingly tiny accommodations around the house. *

*Went to the vets today, for the inside buns last Droncits and Tilly's Convenia, and my bunnies excellend themselves :?*

*We started with Star. I put him on the table while my vet was facing the other way. He stood there, facing the vet and looked like he was waiting. That was until the vet turned around and tried to hold him, and then he flew at him. Thankfully he didn't bite him or anything, but he looked so sweet sitting and waiting, when actually it looked like he was planning an attack.*

*Sunny decided she wanted me to wear her as a scarf and Sandy did her best to be swallowed by jumping at me and hitting my mouth. Thankfully it was closed (for once)or else she could have had a nasty bite .*

*My vet is still happy Tilly is improving, which is great, and so she can have the Convenia for longer. She is now using one of her ears, which she never used to. She was very sweet at the vets though and got out an affectionate paw for me stroking her, which was cute.*

*I didn't take Roger today, but when Summer and Tilly went back in with him he was so overjoyed, he just sat and groomed them. It was very cute. He missed them so much.*

*I need to get some pictures of some of them later. I'll try and do that if I can keep my eyes open long enough.*


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## polly (Nov 28, 2008)

LMBO Trace, don't ya love successful vet visits  and a big awwww for roger


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## NZminilops (Nov 28, 2008)

*Flashy wrote:*


> *Sandy did her best to be swallowed by jumping at me and hitting my mouth. Thankfully it was closed (for once)or else she could have had a nasty bite .*



:laugh: 

That sure makes a change from the bunnies biting us huh :toastingbuns


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## Flashy (Nov 29, 2008)

Sandy has never been a biter, or else I miught have just opened my mouth when I realised where she was going 

* * * 

*Roger is a bit of a funny guy. I tamed him from being completely wild and petrified of people and he has come a long way. Unfortunately, over recent weeks I have not been able to give him the sort of attention I want to, and also, because of this tapeworm shizzle I have had to handle him more than he likes (he is VERY handshy). This has led to him running from me more than he used to, which is sad, but it was necessary for his health (to be handled I mean).

I had some time this morning and so I climbed in the run with them (Summer, Roger and Tilly). Roger did what he normally does and took flight and hid, Summer does what she normally does and came bounding over and Tilly hovered in the middle doing an 'is she going to give me food, is she going to pick me up' type debate (due to her head tilt she is not a fan of being picked up). I got in and crouched down. Summer came and sat in front of me so I gave her some nose rubs. Tilly thought 'this looks good' and came and sat next to Summer for some rubs. So I gave her some, and whilst doing that Summer poked her nose under Tilly's so as I stroked the bottom of Tilly's nose Summer would get a little tap with my finger every so often (not sure why she liked it, but she did). As I was doing this I saw this little Roger face watching. He was watching from behind the perspex in the hutch, then he poked his head around the bed area door (that door stays permanently open, and the perspex covers the day area to ensure they do have a 'bed area' to go in), and then he bounded over, and sat next to Tilly and stuck his nose out. Never, not ONCE, has he done that before. He sat for a fuss and I gave him a fuss for ages. In fact, I had to stop before he was ready because the other two were demanding food by this point. It's one of those little things that is actually a huge massive thing. It shows that even after these few tough weeks the basic level of trust is still there. He's just so cute!
*


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## Flashy (Nov 29, 2008)

*Cloud has some sort of lump in his abdomen. I don't know what, but it doesn't feel that dissimilar from what Sweep had. He is one of the clutch going on Monday so I will get the vet to feel.*


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## Flashy (Dec 1, 2008)

*I have pictures to post, but am not going to upload them right now, for various reasons, but some are really cute.*

*Anyway.*

*Took the second clutch to the vets again, and also got Cloud checked over. Cloud's gut is not right, but on closer inspection he has spurs, so he will be on Metacam, Fibreplex, wet greens and treat hay for the next few days to return his gut to proper working order before his spurs are burred on Friday. He and Candyfloss will have a day at the vets.*

*I paid today after all 14 of mine have gone to the vets twice, each has had two injections, and each has taken up an appointment. He told me to start with he would charge me one consult fee for each session (so four, because I took two lots in twice) and then just the amount of the Droncit they had, and in addition to that he would also give me a 10% discount, although I only found that out on Friday. Well, today I paid and it somehow only came to Â£88. I was amazed! Not sure how the hell they worked that out, but I'm not going to complain.*

*So the tapewormie stuff is now all sorted and finished.*

*I needed some more Fibreplex but they didn't have any at that branch so I went via another branch on the way home (they have 4). The receptionist there is lovely and we often have a good laugh when I go. Today when I arrived she pounced on me and said she wished I was there 2 minutes before. They had a lady come in who has a bunny with head tilt and her regular vets (who incidently were the vets that I used to go to who killed three of my buns through stupid mistakes and lack of knowledge) have told her to get it euthanised. Thanksfully Jan is great and I have been talking to her about Tilly's treatment and how we've been using Convenia and she was able to tell the lady that they have a regular visiting head tilt bun (Tilly) who is having different treatment and its really helping and how head tilt does not mean a death sentence. Jan wanted to pass on my number to her but didn't know if I would be ok with that, but she has told her to come and see my vet because of all we have been doing together. I did tell her that she can pass on my number if they do ever get a situation like that arise again because I am happy to help in those situations, to give hope, to give other titbits of advice that a vet may not think to say (things like about getting up and down off things, or at what points they get more disorientated and stuff). Broke my heart to think of this bun, and also of this lady, so I hope she does change to my vets and does see my vet.*

*(oh and as of tomorrow I won't have a laptop so not sure how much I will be around).*


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## Becca (Dec 1, 2008)

Can't wait to see pictures 

WOAH Thats great Â£88 :shock:

*Faints*


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## polly (Dec 1, 2008)

please can we have more pogo and polo pics trace (after u get laptop back) and badgey boy :biggrin2:

that was good news for that woman tose other vets are totally useless it was good she decided on a second opinion!!


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## Flashy (Dec 2, 2008)

*This isn't about my buns at all, but nevermind. I was talking to mum about the buns at the RSPCA, and I'm going to make essentially what is a big toy box and take it down. I'm going to order a variety of bunny toys and treats, or buy them in shops, get a bix box, wrap the box in Christmas paper, and then take it down. I'm very excited about this because I also plan to give the toys to them myself and take videos to use to help them be rehomed and for people to find them appealing. I love making bunnies happy, and I hope this makes some as yet unwanted bunnies, happy *

*And yes Polly, pics will appear *


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## NZminilops (Dec 2, 2008)

That is such a wonderful idea, I might steal it :run:. PepnFluff and I are meant to be exchanging bunny related gifts for xmas this year but I bought way too much stuff so might save some for the SPCA bunnies here.

How often do you go into thr RSPCA? Was it hard to 'get in'? I've been signed up as a volunteer at the SPCA here for more than a year but they never call me in :lookaround.

You know you could just accidently take some pictures of Sandy too and I wont mind, as well as the Pogo and Polo pics.

:tongue


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## Wabbitdad12 (Dec 2, 2008)

*Flashy wrote: *


> *This isn't about my buns at all, but nevermind. I was talking to mum about the buns at the RSPCA, and I'm going to make essentially what is a big toy box and take it down. I'm going to order a variety of bunny toys and treats, or buy them in shops, get a bix box, wrap the box in Christmas paper, and then take it down. I'm very excited about this because I also plan to give the toys to them myself and take videos to use to help them be rehomed and for people to find them appealing. I love making bunnies happy, and I hope this makes some as yet unwanted bunnies, happy *
> 
> *And yes Polly, pics will appear *


Great Idea!


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## Flashy (Dec 3, 2008)

I have pics of Sandy too, actually doing a very good Sakura impression with her disapproval  It's just a bit hard to upload them onto a computer because it's my mum's laptop.

As for the RSPCA, I first applied back in March 06, and had a time and date to go for an induction, but couldn't go that week because I was ill, and asked them to let me know when the next one was because I did still want to volunteer, but they never did (rescues seem to be pretty rubbish at communication, lol).

Then last January I went to a rabbit show and the RSPCA had a stall and there was a teeny tiny little sign asking for people who know about rabbits because the RSPCA needs rabbit knowledge people to do home visits for people adopting rabbits. So I called, spoke to my now supervisor, had a home visit myself and we went from there. So I don't actually volunteer at the place, but I go down there normally every week or two to see the buns, but I haven't been for a while with all the wormie stuff. 

I would suggest that you keep pushing them Michelle, because you would be ace there. Sometimes paper work gets lost, or people are disorganised. Also, at ours you have to say when you want to go, they don't ask you, so it might be you have to make the first move or something like that.


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## Flashy (Dec 3, 2008)

*No pictures yet, sorry! I've been out most of the day.*

*I spend a lot of my time tearful/crying (God that sounds pathetic, lol), but today has been worse and I had no idea why, but then it dawned on me. I have been out and bought a load of toys to donate to the RSPCA (I've spent in excess of Â£150 on it all :?which I'm a bit pleased to be able to say I can afford due to being now registered as disabled and getting a huge benefit for it), and buying things for bunnies knowing it will make them happy, makes me feel good. So why am I tearful? Because I just feel so deeply sorry for those poor unwanted buns. They all deserve homes and I hate that they don't have them. The positive is that I know they have a huge enclosure, they have food, water, human interaction, and they are safe, but its not the same as having a home. I've never appreciated until this year all about the rescue world and how it works.*

*I've met some stunning bunnies this year, and I do the pre adoption visit, and the post adoption visit (very different from the US, I believe). I see the buns in the shelter, and when I see them in a home it is a completely different bunny. There have been times when I have been hard pushed to believe it's the same bun. A home makes such a difference to those buns. The love, I guess.*

*My own Candyfloss was my very first rescue. I went to the RSPCA one day and there was this beautiful white bun. She was sitting REALLY high up on top of a huge hutch. I've never seen a bun sit up there before. She was a Cloud-a-like with longer ears. She came over straight away for a fuss, and was very people friendly. She had been found by a lady in her garden and so they had to wait 7 days before putting her up for adoption. She was so friendly the theory is she escaped from wherever she lived, and she had been much loved there (she is definitely a houdini that's for sure). She arrived on the Saturday and by the Tuesday I had reserved her (think of that as a priviledge for being their volunteer, lol). I had to wait the seven days, then she was spayed, and she came home asap. She first bonded with the Dopeys and Cloud triountil she decided she wanted Cloud all to herself and she now lives wiht just Cloud and the Dopeys are just by themselves again. She is unrecognisable from the bun I got. She's ace though  Although, to be honest, had I known she would have taken Cloud away from the Dopeys, I probably wouldn't have got her, but I definitely won't be taking her back.*

*I took in my first foster two days before getting Candyfloss. I had done a pre adoption visit for a little bun called Harley and had failed it because the hutch was appallingly small (we say 6ft by 2ft minimum, this was 3ft by 1ft for a pair), but he bullied my supervisor and she backed down. I worked very closely with the guy and got a good working relationship with him so that I could hopefully prod him in the right direction. When it became clear he was a fool and ignoring my advice I invited myself round with the intension of making him think it was his idea to surrender Harley, and it worked, I manipulated him into thinking it was his idea to give up that bun. I already had a new home lined up for him. Harley has been there since early July, and he was only with me for a week, but he was so happy, a different bun from at the centre, from at his accidental adopters house. He now has a girlfriend (Called Floppy, which is a story in itself because she was another bun I had to rehome myself), a loving family, oodles of run time and he is SO happy. *

*Today I went round to see a bunny adopted out in May. She was adopted out as a baby and the new owners waited until she was spayed to bond her with their bun, which was great, however, when it came to it, they couldn't do it because there was no neutral territory, they were anxious and their bun Bracken was a bit of a bully, lol. So I did it. They came to mine for a day and I didn't do the full bonding, but got them over that hurdle. Liquorice and Bracken are now fully bonded and they both look so haappy. It was amazing to see the difference in both buns. They were just so shiney in their coat. Really happy *

*I have never talked really about the stories behind Roger, Tilly and Summer, but I do intend to. Not right now, but soon.*

*I was feeling very grateful for my buns tonight, and very grateful for them, that they have a home full of love, and everything most of them need (with the exception of some friends for some) so they all got a large piece of apple/pear/banana and enjoyed that. They are so lucky, and so am I. I hope those poor buns at the centre are lucky sometimes soon too. Especially Noddy and Beauty who have been there since November 2006.*


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## JadeIcing (Dec 3, 2008)

It is amazing what fostering can do for you. It is such an awesome feeling. I have a page on my site dedicated to my fosters.


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## Flashy (Dec 4, 2008)

Fostering is definitely amazing, but for me, it is probably more eye opening because of everything else I do for the RSPCA. If I just fostered I don't think I would feel quite the same as I do now.

*

Anyway, this is going to be avery short rant.

What is the point of asking for help and then ignoring it. Ignorance is no excuse for neglect, but when you have the information and choose not to use it, that is down right disgusting.

/rant.

See, VERY short, lol.


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## Flashy (Dec 4, 2008)

[align=center]*inkbouce:I've FINALLYbought a bra that fits!inkbouce:*[/align]
For once I have all bits of both boobs contained, no overflow or anything. It's a 32FF, although I think I actually need a 30, which would make it a 30G? But right now, this bra fits, and I think I'm in love with it. My old ones were too small, but I couldn't afford to get anymore.

It is a wonderbra, has detachable straps, and is SO comfy. I keep walking around like holding my boobs lol because it feels SO good!

So yeh, just wanted to share. :biggrin2:

(I was going to post this on a thread of its own, but I thought the mods might tell me off and find it inappropriate, so its FAR less obvious here).


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## NZminilops (Dec 4, 2008)

I am sorry but I just about fell over giggling just now! I love your wording . That is one post where I think I wont ask for pictures on though haha!

I hate bras and here in the regular shops the largest you can get is DD and I am an E (I think, I've never been fitted) so I'm always feeling stuffed into things that are too small. Why is it they give the huge knockers to those of us that don't have 10 babies to feed, what do we need them for?  I'm glad you found one you like though yay! I must have a look on the internet for something too as the stores are useless. And good idea sneaking that into you blog .


I'm sorry to hear of you crying and all that . It's good you got on a benefit though, I am on a small one also and it's such a relief to have enough money to do bunny stuff. You have a much worse rabbit problem there with needing homes etc and I can't imagine how hard it must be to see their sad faces all the time :?. Thank goodness that there are people like you who do care though, at least they have you.

I haven't forgotten you've said you have some Sandy pictures up there so I'm going to be asking you every 5 minutes if you have your laptop back yet so I can see them.....has it been 5 minutes yet?


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## polly (Dec 4, 2008)

Nice to hear you have managed to contain that chest of yours lmao I know from what shaz says (she has big boobs as well) how hard it is to get something that fits is comfortable and doesnt take teh skin off your shoulders!! makes me glad mine are small otherwise I might fall over


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## Becca (Dec 4, 2008)

*Does mini happy dance to congratulate Tracy on finding a great bra* 

Okayy that was a bit long :? HEHE

Thanks for today!

Give Cloud a good luck cuddle for the dental tomorrow *Kiss Kiss*

How are all your buns?


xx


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## NZminilops (Dec 4, 2008)

*polly wrote:*


> makes me glad mine are small otherwise I might fall over


Tracy was telling me once that you are pretty short so you're lucky you have small ones! I'm 4'11", I bet you're still taller than me :grumpy:. You're one of those lovely little cute delicate women like my mum .


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## Flashy (Dec 4, 2008)

I was saying nice things about you to Michelle, Polly, I promise! *polishes halo*

My boobs are not as contained tonight as they were this morning, which is an interesting concept. I may be bigger than I thought. I need to order another two, so guess I'll get the next size up and see what happens.

Smaller is definitely easier, but I wouldn't change mine, they get me free things :biggrin2:

My buns seem ok thanks Becca. Cloud is as prepared as he can be for tomorrow, and the others are all very normal. Thanks for asking


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## polly (Dec 4, 2008)

not by much Michelle Im 5ft2" cute and delicate I dont think so lmao

Trace i def. dont get free things but my 18 year old neice does lol!! lucky you though big boobs can be very useful!!


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## Flashy (Dec 4, 2008)

Cute yes, delicate, no


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## NZminilops (Dec 4, 2008)

Oh yes it was all good things, except for when Tracy told me about your.....no wait, I can't tell that story on here, it's simpy *too much*! Just teasing though, all I heard was that you were short .

Tracy, are you sure you're not secretly that Jordan/Katy Price person? :shock:


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## Flashy (Dec 4, 2008)

Funnily enough I used to have the exact same measurements as Jordan, boobs, waist, hips, at any rate, although mine was au naturelle *is proud* lol.


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## Wabbitdad12 (Dec 4, 2008)

*polly wrote: *


> Nice to hear you have managed to contain that chest of yours lmao I know from what shaz says (she has big boobs as well) how hard it is to get something that fits is comfortable and doesnt take teh skin off your shoulders!! makes me glad mine are small otherwise I might fall over


As a guy, I feel so uncomfortable with this portion of your blog!:blushan:


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## NZminilops (Dec 4, 2008)

You must have a knockout body Tracy :shock:! Thank god you don't have a dogs dinner of a face like her though .

Oh no you've made a man blush haha! Poor wabbitdad .


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## JadeIcing (Dec 4, 2008)

Bah I am 42DDD So there. :X:X


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## MissBinky (Dec 4, 2008)

Best Blog of the Day :biggrin2:

Now I must go wipes me screen... lol


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## NZminilops (Dec 4, 2008)

I agree haha!

I never get what the number before the cup size means, is that your clothing size? Or is that the measurement around your boobs and back? Mine says 42 on it as well. Is that an inch thing? Geez :shock: I hope not.

DDD, does that mean you have three breasts?


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## NorthernAutumn (Dec 5, 2008)

The 42 is in inches, and is the circumference around the torso...
Glad your boobs are no longer wild and free, Tracy  When I find a great bra, I tend to buy like 5, and keep them for when the 1st wears out, rather than perpetually going bra shopping:?
Pretty jealous of your proportions tho! Sounds like you're blessed with a great healthy body 

I thought that was really wonderful of you to buy bunny toys... I'm sure it will while away the hours for the little guys while they wait for home...


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## Flashy (Dec 5, 2008)

I came back to this thread this morning, and really laughed at what had happened in my absence. I had no idea what to say to it all though, lol. So I'll just be very amused and carry on as normal. I think that's best. :biggrin2:

* * 

*Cloud had his dental today. He is now home, he is eating and pooing and doing really well. His mouth has not been cut, or shown any signs of problems, so it was caught at the very early stages. We (being the vet and me) had a very interesting conversation about howmost of the time they see rabbits who are dribbling, anorexic, etc, and yet mine always come in before that, which means me and my buns are well ahead of the game. I think it's just a mix of I know them so well, and chance, lol.*

*He is looking at me like a complete grump right now, like if he got the chance he would launch at my jugual and tear my head from my neck. Candyfloss, on the other hand, is loving being inside and we have DBFs EVERYWHERE!*

*I have something very exciting to try and post later. I can't wait *


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## Becca (Dec 5, 2008)

Thats great about Cloud Tracy!!

Bless him!


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## polly (Dec 5, 2008)

Glad he is ok Trace and sounds like Candyfloss is ok with him too which is great


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## Flashy (Dec 5, 2008)

*Here it is. I'm VERY excited!*


[align=center]




[/align]
[align=center]




[/align]
[align=center][/align]

[align=left]*In there we have*[/align]
*2 Chubes
1 Smaller Chube
2 Tunnels
2 Domes
1 Roller Bell Toy
6 Bell Balls
1 Flip N Toss Carrot
1 Ka-bobble Bird Toy
1 Rock N Roller Bunny wood chew
1 Wooden ball
1 Treat Ball
1 Ring-a-Ding-Dong wood chew
1 Boredom breaker (three wood chews on a wire)
1 Gnaw Stone Snack
4 Bundles of sticks
4 Woven Willow balls
3 Willow balls
2 Hanging chews.
6 Mini carrot Toys
1 Wooden carrot chew
4 Bark chews
Pack of sticks
2 Nut Knobblers
2 Large different bird toys
2 Smaller bird toys
1 Parrot Ladder
1 Bag of Timothy hay (unsealed, we opened it and used toilet rolls, old tissue boxes, etc, to put some in)*

*I think I missed something, but it looks ace and I'm VERY excited.*

*Me and mum are going to take it all down tomorrow. Mum will do some filming and I will take some pics, and hopefully use it all to help get those buns adopted, then the toys and stuff will hopefully last a long time *


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## Flashy (Dec 5, 2008)

I tried to make the pics bigger but it wouldn't co-operate.


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## polly (Dec 5, 2008)

wow trace what a fab box the bunnies will be in heaven playing with them all :biggrin2:


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## Wabbitdad12 (Dec 5, 2008)

Thats a great collection of toys! There's going to be a lot of happy bunny's!


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## Flashy (Dec 6, 2008)

*Just thought I would share a few pics. All these are all at the centre.*

[align=center]*Noddy



*[/align]
[align=center]*Beauty



*[/align]
[align=center]*Noddy and Beauty



*[/align]
[align=center]*2 WildX domestic buns



*[/align]
[align=center]*Storm



*[/align]
[align=center]*Sukie (who is reserved)



*[/align]
[align=center]*Ghost and Babe (Who are reserved)



*[/align]
[align=left]*We took 200 pics and 30 mins of video. They will be made into videos to entice people to adopt them (especially Noddy and Beauty), and I will post those when I have done them too.*[/align]
[align=left]*I'm hoping to get some pics of mine tomorrow! Before anyone nags *[/align]


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## Becca (Dec 6, 2008)

Those bunnies look so happy 

And FINALLY we could do with some more pics :biggrin2:


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## polly (Dec 6, 2008)

I loove storm what a beauty  they all look like they love their toys bet you had a great time today :biggrin2:


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## Flashy (Dec 6, 2008)

*Hmm. Hope's eye is running again. Same eye. It hasn't done that for two weeks, and is running now. How RANDOM! It has a slightly milky colour, so I will be bathing it again, three times a day. He also feels slightly thinner, so I'm going to give him double feeds. I'm wondering if his spurs are back, but I'm not sure. Last time he didn't lose weight, his gut visibly slowed, but that hasn't happened this time, and he is stuffing hay too. *

*I wonder if maybe he is doing something that could contribute to this, or maybe someone is overgrooming, because both Sunny and Dawn is groomers, and the Dopeys have irritated each others eyes before with grooming. *

*I'll just have to keep an 'eye'. *


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## Becca (Dec 6, 2008)

Awwh poor Hope, errm.....'Hope' he's okay

Your such a great bunny mum, only someone truly dedicated would bathe their buns eyes and know straight away that something was wrong.

Kudos to you 
Best wishes to Hope


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## Wabbitdad12 (Dec 6, 2008)

They are all adorable, especially Storm, such a beautiful coat!


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## NZminilops (Dec 7, 2008)

That is amazing what you did for those RSPCA bunnies, and may I say Ghost and Babe are gorgeous .

Keeping an eye on the eye, heh, you funny monkey . I hope it's nothung bad. One of my buns Bailey had cronic runny eyes.


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## Flashy (Dec 7, 2008)

I think Hope needs to go to the vets.

I never used to have any qualms about taking a bun to see my vet, but just recently I have been there so much I feel like I shouldn't go. Most of the times I go there are not for mine, or like with the wormies, it was due to my foster, but obviously all mine had to go.

I will take him, just, ack!


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## Becca (Dec 7, 2008)

Awwh  Poor Hope.

Is the vets far from you Tracy? Does it take long to get there?


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## Flashy (Dec 7, 2008)

They have four branches, so they range from 15 mins away to 30 mins away. He will go tomorrow. He is a bit meh, so has had some metacam, and hopefully that will keep him moving until tomorrow.


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## Becca (Dec 7, 2008)

Ah - not too far then, ours is about 20-30 mins away.

Prayers for Hope


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## JadeIcing (Dec 7, 2008)

I hate having to go to the vet. Feels like I don't go for just a check up any more. Just for someone sick.


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## polly (Dec 7, 2008)

Trace that sucks Poor Hope sending nose rubs


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## Flashy (Dec 8, 2008)

*I just want to say that I know what I said in someone elses thread might be hard for some people to deal with, and thatâs ok, I know that, and I also know that sometimes you have to take a step back from people, but I am not willing to be picked up and dropped as and when people feel like it. Iâm not going to allow people to mess me about like that. You do what you have to do for you*[/b] *And Iâll do what I have to do for me. I want no further mention nor discussion about that on here, I just felt it had to be said after something said to me.*

[/b][/b]



[align=center]** * * * **[/b][/align]

*Anyway!

Right, before I start its important you know I was wearing ârabbit clothesâ. They have holes in the knees, and are covered in crud, currently. I was also wearing âHobo Glovesâ as my brother calls them, or âfingerless glovesâ as most other people call them. I only dress like this when doing the buns, or on a day when I have to go out. I donât leave the house in this state. I promise.*

[/b]*So, I give you the outside buns.

I started with the Dopeys given Pollyâs constant nagging *

[/b]

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*Dopey makes a getaway...

*
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*[/b][/align]
*...straight to me.

*
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*[/b][/align]
*Dopey does some more wandering...

*
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*[/b][/align]
*...then puts herself away...

*
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*[/b][/align]
*...before going for another wander.

*
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*[/b][/align]
*Dopey running.

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*[/b][/align]
*The Dopeys were VERY unimpressed with the aeroplane going overhead.

*
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*[/b][/align]
*So head back downstairs and go for another wander.

*
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*

After the Dopeys I plonked myself in with the Fosters. *

*They were very active, but I think they thought I was bringing them food. I was not, lol. I bought them myself and a camera.*

*Whilst the girls were confident all was well...*[/b][/b]

[/b]
[/b]


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*[/b][/align]
*...Roger was unsurprisingly not sure.

*
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*[/b][/align]
*Tilly pops up between my legs (as you do, lol).

*
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*[/b][/align]
*Tilly moving around well (looking good mid-moult).

*
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*[/b][/align]
*Jumping Tilly.

*
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*[/b][/align]
*Roger is still not sure, so has been hiding under the hutch.

*
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*[/b][/align]
*Summer coming at me with great pace.

*
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*Tilly jumping over Rogery.

*
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*[/b][/align]
*Look at this cute little Roger face.

*
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*[/b][/align]
*Oh, and not sure if anyone remembers that Summer had a wet dewlap from dunking it in her water, well, on the fifth attempt of finding something that works we found it. This works very, very well.

*
[/b]


[align=center]*



*[/b][/align]
*

I went over to Cloudyfloss then, and what happens? Cloud immediately runs to his food bowl. Do you think he was trying to tell me something?*

[/b]
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*[/b][/align]
*He then sat next to it. Talk about a cadger.

*
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*[/b][/align]
*Candyfloss is really hard to take a pic of, because she comes straight over. I got a load of noses, lol, and these were the best of the bunch.

*
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*

Dusk has gotten a bit fat, so Iâm slowly slimming him down in preparation for him meeting and hopefully bonding with Sandy. *

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*[/b][/align]
*I thought this pic was really cute, and was gutted itâs blurry, but I had to put it in anyway.

*
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*Watching his brother, Angel.

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*

Lightning is a funny guy, when I first arrived and sat don,w he legged it. *

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*[/b][/align]
*But quickly came back to seek out the source of the bad smell (given I have been in with all the others at this point, I must have stunk!).

*
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*I think this one is really cute 

*
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*[/b][/align]
*And then why I got out he stood up. Not sure if he was checking to make sure I actually WAS leaving, or if he didnât want me to go, lol, probably the former.

*
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*[/b][/align]
*

When I went to take pictures of Angel, I couldnât find him. He was hiding and surveying the land.*

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*He soon shifted though, when he realises his lid was off.

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*And he might be able to find some yummy food.

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*(I'm going to colour code the names later).*[/align]


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## irishbunny (Dec 8, 2008)

Aw all the bunnies are so cute!


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## Flashy (Dec 8, 2008)

*I took Hope to the vets this arvo.*

*He has conjunctivitis, so has the cream to sort that out. The vet looked at his spurs and said they weren't drastic, but they might be enough to make him uncomfortable. So I have to Metacam him incase his gut symptoms are due to being uncomfortable from the eye infection, and see if after that has all cleared up he is normal again. If not, or if things worsen, then he will have a dental. *

*Hope has always been easily unsettled (before he was bonded with Sunny he used to live next door to her and when she went for her spay he wouldn't eat until she came back. I would bet his spurs are causing him a problem, but we shall see.*

*Also, in the end I took Star too. He also has a weepy eye. All I can think of is that with this really cold weather they have/he has sat with that eye facing the window. I keep the tiny window in my room open a crack to keep a fresh circulation of air going, but maybe it doesn't work in the wold weather. Although yesterday it was sunny, despite being cold, so I opened the main one a bit. It was ok in there but maybe it bothered their eyes.*

*I guess time will tell.*


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## JadeIcing (Dec 8, 2008)

Man I don't know which bunny I need more. :shock:


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## polly (Dec 8, 2008)

awwww pogo and pole  they are soo funny do they actually do everything together? and that is such a cute pic of cloud and his food bowl lol.

soo cute Trace :biggrin2::biggrin2::biggrin2:


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## Wabbitdad12 (Dec 8, 2008)

*Flashy wrote: *


> *Right, before I start its important you know I was wearing ârabbit clothesâ. They have holes in the knees, and are covered in crud, currently. I was also wearing âHobo Glovesâ as my brother calls them, or âfingerless glovesâ as most other people call them. I only dress like this when doing the buns, or on a day when I have to go out. I donât leave the house in this state. I promise.*
> [/b]


Sounds OK to me.


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## Flashy (Dec 8, 2008)

*Wabbitdad12 wrote: *


> *Flashy wrote: *
> 
> 
> > *Right, before I start its important you know I was wearing ârabbit clothesâ. They have holes in the knees, and are covered in crud, currently. I was also wearing âHobo Glovesâ as my brother calls them, or âfingerless glovesâ as most other people call them. I only dress like this when doing the buns, or on a day when I have to go out. I donât leave the house in this state. I promise.*
> ...



Except I made a typo! I was going to edit it so noooooooooo one would notice, and now it's cemented into history *pouts*

I MEANT to say



> *I only dress like this when doing the buns, or on a day when I don'thave to go out. I donât leave the house in this state. I promise.*



Thanks Dave! 

And yes Polly, they do EVERYthing together.


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## Wabbitdad12 (Dec 8, 2008)

No problem Tracey, what are friends for!:biggrin2:


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## Flashy (Dec 8, 2008)

*I'm very gutted and quite upset now.*

*I volunteer for the RSPCA, as the world and his mate know, and I declare homes fit or unfit to go to. I also do a post adoption phonecall a month after collection, and a post adoption visit three months after adoption.*

*I did the call in October and allw as well. I called tonight to arrange the post adoption visit and found out one of the buns died 6 weeks ago. It was taken by a fox. The other bun was found running wild.*

*I'm so gutted. I really let that bun down. I thought the area was secure and it obviously wasn't. I have let down SO MANY buns in the past few years and the whole idea of knowledge was that I wouldn't do that anymore, but really all it did was make me feel confident in my knowledge and unleash me on the world to let down more buns.*

*I'm so sorry Sooty, I'm so sorry Coco.*

*Binky free Sooty. I hope it was quick and painless. Coco, I will do my best for you. I'm just so sorry.*


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## TinysMom (Dec 8, 2008)

Flashy....sometimes we can think something is secure...and something happens and it isn't.

When we first moved into this house - Puck was young..like maybe 9 weeks old. We had walked the fence more than once to make sure there was no place he could get out....and during the first week - he did really great. 

One day I had him out and I went inside to go to the bathroom (we don't have birds of prey around here - at least not often - and we have bushes for them to duck under and it didn't seem worth it to bring him in only to take him back out 5 minutes later...).

Well - the phone rings and I answer it - I was inside maybe 15-20 minutes and there comes a knock at the door. It's our neighbor....with Puck in his hands.

Somehow - that little stinker found his way out of our yard.

We walked the fence again more times....couldn't figure it out.

Then one time I put him out and acted like I was going back inside. He turned around to check for me - then he went over and suddenly - poof - he was gone. We found out where he was getting out.

But if I remember right - at least two people - maybe three people - had walked that fence area several times to make sure it was safe. He was just a little twerp who could get into trouble!

My point? Maybe something happened and the fence was safe when you looked - but somehow the bunnies managed to get a way out anyway. It does happen!

By the way - Art blocked Puck's "out" with a brick...and even for a couple of years later - when Puck would get playtime outside- he'd check to see if we were watching - and head over to that corner to see if he could get out...he remembered!


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## NZminilops (Dec 9, 2008)

Oh no I am so sorry Tracy , you must be miserable. Please know it wasn't your fault. You can't see into the future or stick around all the homes you check, and rabbits will escape when rabbits want to escape.

YOU didn't let him down, his owners did. 

RIP Sooty :rainbow:.


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## PepnFluff (Dec 9, 2008)

Aww I'm sorry Flashy, In know way is Sooty's death your fault. Don't beat your self up ok :hug: 

Also what breed is Dusky and Angel? They look EXACTLY like Fluff and his breed has been eluding me the whole time i've had him...

Hugs again:hug2:


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## Flashy (Dec 10, 2008)

*Polly has told me a story about a bunny. It's so sad. It made me cry. She wants me to take the bunny and either have it myself or find her a good home. It breaks my heart and I truly want to, but my mum is worried about me bringing something else here, like what we did with Summer. I can't risk my buns, and really, I can't risk anyone elses (because bringing any new bun in is risky). I just don't know what to do. I want to cuddle this bun and make everything better for her.*


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## Flashy (Dec 12, 2008)

[align=center]*Noddy and Beauty Need a Forever Home.*[/align]
[align=center]

[flash=320,256]http://uk.youtube.com/v/BBWF2uBcT-4[/flash][/align]
[align=center]

[/align]


[align=left]*This is the first video I made using the footage from when I took down the Christmas Donation.*[/align]*


[align=left]**I went down yesterday and the Manager thanked me profusely for it all. No one had told her but she saw the stuff in the cages and then the rest of the box in the kitchen so found out who it was from. That made my day because when she says thanks she really means it. Also, it made me feel better because earlier on I had been down to the enclosures and the bun's toys had just been piled up, and the domed turned over and flat. Basically the volunteers had just tidied them to allow them to tody the area and not put them out again, which I thought was sad. I mentioned it to the Manager and she said that you have to train people to do that. Maybe now they will be told to spread the toys out. Some of the toys I took in have definitely been well played with already, which is great. *[/align]


[align=left]*I don't feel particularly good about being on the forum at the mo. So if I'm not around (I may or may not be), that's why (just a warning due to something someone said to me about me disappearing and being worried about that happening). If I'm not around chances are I also won't be on msn either.*[/align]


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## Becca (Dec 12, 2008)

I'm just catching up on your blog 

Those pictures you took are gorgeous!! I love them!

And that video was precious.... and in NO way was it your fault about Sooty and Coco, I know how hard you work to find bunnies the greatest homes ever and it's heartbreaking when something like that happens. And it is not your fault at all :grumpy:

Poor Hope  Sure with your excellent care he will be fine soon!

Becca


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## JadeIcing (Dec 12, 2008)

*Flashy wrote: *


> *I'm so gutted. I really let that bun down. I thought the area was secure and it obviously wasn't. I have let down SO MANY buns in the past few years and the whole idea of knowledge was that I wouldn't do that anymore, but really all it did was make me feel confident in my knowledge and unleash me on the world to let down more buns.*
> 
> *I'm so sorry Sooty, I'm so sorry Coco.*
> 
> *Binky free Sooty. I hope it was quick and painless. Coco, I will do my best for you. I'm just so sorry.*



You didn't! It is a very hard thing to see EVERY possibble thing that could go wrong. We are not mind readers so we can't tell if a person is lying. No matter how many things we try and make sure are just perfect things can still go wrong. Please don't blame yourself. 

Ali


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## NZminilops (Dec 12, 2008)

> [align=left]*I don't feel particularly good about being on the forum at the mo. So if I'm not around (I may or may not be), that's why (just a warning due to something someone said to me about me disappearing and being worried about that happening). If I'm not around chances are I also won't be on msn either.*[/align]


I'm sorry to hear that, I'll miss your postings.


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## Flashy (Dec 13, 2008)

*I'm quite worried about Star. He had this watery eye that started at the beginning of the week. On Wednesday I started him on Fucithlamic cream (?)or HOWEVER it's spelt. Today I bathed the eyebecause it is still running, but it is clear, and I seem to have made things worse. It ran even more after that, so I can either only think that a, I irritated it further, or b, if he has something in it, I moved it and it caused more problems.*

*I have a vague concern that this might be tooth related, but he has not shown any spurs related problems. He eats hay in preference to anything else, including his pellets (which he spreads over the day). He does have slightly smaller poo at the mo, but he often does. Thankfully, despite this runny eye he is very alert and lively, he is still eating and stuffing his face and it does not seem to be bothering him loads, which is something. I'm going to keep bathing it and see what happens.*

*On a side note, Hope's eye seems to be all better now, so I just have to finish the course of the cream for him.*

*Lightning excelled himself and sometimes between me giving him water yesterday and me giving it to him today he dumped the contents in his litter tray. HOW? I'm not sure, but that's where the bowl was. He can't have been without water for overly long though because he didn't show any interest in the fresh water when I put it in.*


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## Flashy (Dec 14, 2008)

*I had a horrible dream about Sweep last night. I'm not going to go into too greater details, but he was with us on holiday, in his run (and where we were on holiday ooked like our garden) and I was filimg somebun else and Sweep disappeared. We seacrhed everywhere but couldn't find him. Later that day I was watching the footage I had filmed and realised Sweep had jumped into the pond. Dad went and fished him out and even after all those hours she was just barely alive. I picked him up and cuddled him and just held him to me. We then went on search for a vet and the holiday vet (this all makes a lot of sense, lol) only worked over summer and so there was no vet and so I just had to hold Sweep until he died. It was not pleasant and took me back to the day he was euthanised. I woke up rememberingh exactly how he felt that day.*


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## polly (Dec 14, 2008)

*hugs * trace what a horrible dream


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## Becca (Dec 15, 2008)

*Flashy wrote: *


> *I had a horrible dream about Sweep last night. I'm not going to go into too greater details, but he was with us on holiday, in his run (and where we were on holiday ooked like our garden) and I was filimg somebun else and Sweep disappeared. We seacrhed everywhere but couldn't find him. Later that day I was watching the footage I had filmed and realised Sweep had jumped into the pond. Dad went and fished him out and even after all those hours she was just barely alive. I picked him up and cuddled him and just held him to me. We then went on search for a vet and the holiday vet (this all makes a lot of sense, lol) only worked over summer and so there was no vet and so I just had to hold Sweep until he died. It was not pleasant and took me back to the day he was euthanised. I woke up rememberingh exactly how he felt that day.*


Awh how horrid Tracy 
I hate having horrible dreams about the bunnies... their the worst ones!

*BIG HUGGLE*

Becca x


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## Flashy (Dec 17, 2008)

*Most of my buns are trundling on ok with the exception of Star who is struggling, and that's my fault both directly and indirectly. He is still having his eye weeping, so I am bathing it and also giving him the cream which is stressing him out. His eating is slowing and he is prety much ignoring his pellets and stuffing hay and eating banana and basil. His poos are actually a good size. That's how it is directly my fault. Indirectly it's my fault because he is a very sensitive bunny and he picks up on everything I feel, and because I feel so rough right now, that is also affecting him more than anyone else.

I'm about to come up to the worst week of the year and I am petrified. I don't always have control of my actions due to the dissociation and the closer I get to the week the more I am dissociating. I'm losing control and that scares me. My depression is really bad and right now I'm spending a fair amount of time crying. 

I have also realised that I am poisonous and evil and so I have cut pretty much everyone out of my life. I can just about write on the forum, but can't deal with PMs, or msn or anything. The only one I can face is Polly because We've always been straight with each other and I trust her to tell me if I'm poisoning her. Having Polly as a friend is like the best present I've had for a long time. I'm so lucky. Sh'es just there, non judgemental, listening to anything I need to say, like last night. And yet she doesn't get scared off, she still wants to talk to me. Very strange, but really nice.

I'm living my life full of anxiety right now too. Fear for Star, fear that something with happen over Christmas to the buns, fear I will lose Sky over Christmas (or at anytime but I just have to block that out), more specifically the 27th, fear that I have made the wrong decision to not have Hope's spurs done, fear that something will happen to Tilly after we stop her injections, fear for me. Actually, panic for me.

I begged my doctor for some sedatives to take to knock me out from the 26th to the 29th Dec, but then I panic that if I take them, what happens if I miss something wrong with the rabbits, that's then another rabbit I have killed, but then if I don't take anything, what happens if I lose control of myself and dissociate, that can be far more severe and then the same problem still arises.

Don't get me wrong, I'm not sitting here and wallowing, I'm doing everything I can to keep busy and distract my mind, but the second I stop, it's all back. That's why I donated to the RSPCA, why I do Christmas shopping for everyone else, why I got my hair cut last week, and dyed today, that's why I have decided to get the free trial paint shop pro for over Christmas (to make avatars and stuff), why I have volunteered to make RSPCA videos for their buns. I'm REALLY trying, but failing pretty dramatically.

I have a doctors appointment on Monday and I'm dreading it. He can't do anything that can really help me, I have to do this all alone. I'm fed up of crying, panicking, dissociating, the lot. I'm fed up of fighting. I want to enjoy Christmas again. I desperately do. I want to be able to talk to people again. I want to be ok. It's no surprise Star is affected and stressed right now given how bad I feel. I hate the fact that I can't even look after my buns properly no matter how much I try.

I wish it was January!*


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## NZminilops (Dec 17, 2008)

I'm not going to pretend I understand and say fake sounding comforting words, but I'm so happy that you have Polly and that you have her to talk to. I realy am. I wish I had a Polly.

It will be January soon enough, hold on until then Tracy. Days will go by like they always have an always will. I know that when you are depressed and going out of your mind with anxiety, each day feels like a month. The things you are doing to occupy yourself and doing things like trying to feel better about yourself (the hair etc) are good things.

I know you only feel like talking with Polly but you know I am here for you if you need me for anything, even someone to scream or yell at...er, type at angrily...I care about you very much and don't like that you've pushed me away. I can understand why, doesn't mean I like it though. I have never felt that you poisoned me in any way, and unless you sneak over here and put arsenic in my tea, there is no way you could . We are all our pwn person and no one can poison us unless we let them - if we let them, them some part of us must have wanted them too.

Besides, you've got nothing to poison anyone with, you're a warm and wonderful person with her heart in the right place.


Please take care of yourself and know that there is hope, there is a future, bad weeks do go by and there is a light at the end of the tunnel.

Michelle xxx


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## NorthernAutumn (Dec 17, 2008)

Keep going strong girl! You're doing all the right things. Stay active, stay in contact with ppl you trust. You WILL get through this.

There is a whole year of rabbits to come, buns who need you, and future bunny moms and dads who need your kind words and advice. Stay active, and stay with ppl. 

You may need constant distraction right now. I know that I go crazy if left in my own head for too long, so I put on my MP3 player, and listen to music, or listen to the radio constantly. Tune into the CBC, or any talking program about interesting things. 

You are going to be OK, Tracy.
BTW, Nate was just suggesting to me you try lithium? I'm sure you already know about it, but he was learning this in psych lately that it can be very helpful. 

Thank you so much for all your work with the rabbits  Maybe to keep busy, you could go do some feral cat trapping? That's exhausting work :biggrin2:.

Go play on cute overload for awhile maybe? 

Keep us updated:hug:

ETA: I'm not making light of how you feel; rather, trying to stay positive in a challanging time for you. I'm glad you have Polly...


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## JadeIcing (Dec 17, 2008)

All I can offer is hugs. 

PS Dusk looks like Connor. I think he is the one I need.


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## TinysMom (Dec 17, 2008)

I have no words - I only have this....

:hugsquish:

I miss chatting with you (even though I've not been on MSN much lately).

I will be praying for you - that the week goes by fairly quickly - and that everybun is fine and that you are fine.

My pm box and email are open to you ....


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## JadeIcing (Dec 17, 2008)

Connor sends kisses. He is great at telling when someone needs them.


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## NZminilops (Dec 17, 2008)

If a kiss from Connor can't bring a teeny smile to Tracy then the world is doomed .

Hope you're doing ok T and just remember people do care about you and you are not all alone in the world, I promise.


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## Flashy (Dec 18, 2008)

*I can't work out why you're all being so nice, but thank you, it was nice to come back to those nice comments, although it was not so nice to see that Ali has stolen Dawn or Dusk and renamed him Connor :grumpy: The picture is cute though 

Took Star to the vets this morning. Charles had a good look in his eye and said that it looks inflamed, but because the other cream has not been working, he has now given me Tiacil to try. That's better because it's only once a day. The twice a day stuff was hard because I had to do it morning (food time) and evening (also food time) which was throwing his appetite due to stress so if it's once a day I can do it at a time when it is not a mealtime. It is also less stressful now he doesn't need to be bathed.

If this doesn't sort it, next plan is a tearduct flush and x-rays. He said that the most common cause of tearduct problems is tooth root problems, and if that's the case, it's only going to get worse. We talked about the different options for what tooth root problems could mean, and basically it would either be manage the condition, or see a specialist to discuss extraction. Sky is the most precious bun I have, but Star and Badger follow pretty close behind. All three of those are very bonded to me in their own way, more than the other 14 we have here.

Charles said we have to give it 7-10 days which takes us straight to Flash's anniversay. This is the worst time for him to get ill because vets are so hard to reach. Knowing that I may have to take him to the vets on**Flash's anniversary has triggered all the flashbacks of Flash's death **again, followed by panic attacks (completely unrelated but when I'm low all the panic surrounding my sectioning comes back and we had a weird anonymous phonecal this morning for my mum but they wouldn't leave who they were, which is exactly what happened before I was sectioned).

I truly hope this Tiacil helps and sorts the problem. I can't bear the thought of having to face all that right now. I know if it happens I will face it all, because I have to. I think my mind is juts running wild. I just need to try and focus on the Tiacil and nothing further right now.*


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## SOOOSKA (Dec 18, 2008)

Tracey i just saw the last bunch of pictures you posted, you have such Beautiful Bunnies. I just LOVE The Dopeys, so cute.

Susan


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## Flashy (Dec 18, 2008)

I spent a large portion of today getting my new avatar ready. It's not going up yet, but here are the pics.

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[/align][align=left]I have just realised Dawn is not square! So I will be fixing him tomorrow. (Dawn is now square) Next comes Polly's avatar.... Once I have her pictures.
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## Becca (Dec 18, 2008)

Tracy they look amazing!! I love the colours!!


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## Flashy (Dec 18, 2008)

Happy to make you one if you want Becca


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## Becca (Dec 18, 2008)

*Flashy wrote: *


> Happy to make you one if you want Becca



Really :shock:


Will you?? Thanks superly duperly!!

I'll PM you the pics!

If you don't mind obviously


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## Flashy (Dec 18, 2008)

Send me the pics you want, and also say if you want any writing, any title pagey bits, if you want RIP with Nibbles picture/s and also, if you want to look at mine and see if you like any of the backgrounds or the way they are done and let me know about that too


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## JadeIcing (Dec 18, 2008)

I think you stole Connor. He is my baby. 

I love the pics for your avatar. Can not wait to see it together.


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## Flashy (Dec 18, 2008)

*I have a proud mum moment  My boy Sky used to know how to do both upstairs and downstairs and he somehow forgot how to go downstairs when he started living in my room, but just tonight he has poddled himself down here to see me  I love my big boy so much *


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## Becca (Dec 19, 2008)

*Flashy wrote: *


> *I have a proud mum moment  My boy Sky used to know how to do both upstairs and downstairs and he somehow forgot how to go downstairs when he started living in my room, but just tonight he has poddled himself down here to see me  I love my big boy so much *



Awwwh bless 
I bet he was so pleased with himself - hehe!!

I love the word 'poddled' LOL!!

Bless him - Hugs to you and Sky


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## NZminilops (Dec 19, 2008)

*Flashy wrote: *


> *I can't work out why you're all being so nice, but thank you, it was nice to come back to those nice comments*


Duh, because we like you , silly goose. :hug:

I love the word poddled too! That about describes the way I walk. I must be a rabbit .


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## NorthernAutumn (Dec 21, 2008)

Hope your Sunday has been full of happy, healthy buns, Tracy.
I'm still impressed with your big box of toys, BTW.


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## Flashy (Dec 21, 2008)

*Thanks  My buns actually seem to be currently very good. Star's eye has stopped running, which is great, although he is still eating slower than before, but I think that is more likely to be stress than anything else.*

Hopefully that will ease, but given he is so sensitive to me that's unlikely right now. I'm getting very lost and confused as to who and what is real and what is in my head. I was somewhere on Friday that I probably shouldn't have been and I think I nearly got caught by the police. That's not good (and no, I wasn't breaking any laws or anything, or doing anything bad, just in a place that they probably would have removed me from). I'm very lost in my head right now, and very confused. I need to chill for the bunnies sake, but whilst I'm not stressed, I'm not right.


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## Becca (Dec 21, 2008)

Thats great the buns are all good 

I hope everything goes a bit better for you soon... Hugs to you!


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## NZminilops (Dec 21, 2008)

My nosey side wonders where you were that the police wouldn't want you to be, but I wont pry. Were you at an RO members house stealing their rabbits? 

Are you feeling confused about things because someone is betraying you, or is it due to your mental health? Or aren't you quite sure? It must be hard to feel like you don't know what's going on or who are you/what you're meant to be doing or not doing.

Right now I'm a bit the same but with paranoia - I am 99% sure that everyone who talks to me is a fake and are just pretending to like me to get info from me (don't know why I think that , I don't have any interesting information to give!). I know that nobody likes me so I guess it comes from that.

It's good that your rabbits are well, have you done anything fun with them lately?


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## Flashy (Dec 21, 2008)

My reality and 'delusions' are becoming blurred (apparently, lol). I say apparently because the doc has said many times I suffer from the delusions, and when you look at the world around you and don't know if you exist, or if others exist or what x, y, z is or what it means/does/is, then something is going wrong. I hav been told it's my mental health, but only by a friend. I wonfder what the doctor will say tomorrow, ol.

I'm sorry things are bad for you. Let me tell you this though, and you won't believe it now, but maybe one day you will, but people know where they stand with me. A prime example being Becca, who I have given a hard time to, but equally have told her recently that I thought she has been maturing really well and showing herself to be a good member of the forum. If I don't like somoene, I will avoid them, and you can probably tell I don't avoid you (well, not anymore than the next person right now), infact, yours is one of thew few blogs I read, you are one of the few unblocked people on msn, and I wouldn't be replying to you on here. I do like you, a lot. You're smaryt, funny, we have a nice relaxed convo when we chat, as well as deeper convos, you're honest and level and I actually really enjoy talking to you. Take from that what you will, but I do like you. That also means your statement about how nobody likes you is not true (unless I'm a nobody, which I can very well bleieve). I do understand though that it can be easier to believe no one likes you both for your own protection against them, and yoursefl. Maybe one day when people are consitent and also you have more esteem, you can believe that you are likeable


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## Sabine (Dec 21, 2008)

Hi flashy, I am so sorry you are going through all this. I rarely get the chance to read blogs and I actually only read through it because i missed your presence on the forum lately. I wish I could say anything useful,,,,
But on a practical level, about your bun's eye infection. Have you ever tried eye bright tea? After her operation Raylann's eye started all oozing green again. I cleared it out with the infusion and it's been clear since. I also use it for the kids. Works every time. Never had to use any cream or antibiotics


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## Becca (Dec 23, 2008)

Tracy how have you given me a hard time?? I can't remember? LOL 

And Thanks!

And I don't really have anything useful to say so I shall shut up :hug:

And alsoooo Michelle I like you - your a great friend :hug1


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## NZminilops (Dec 23, 2008)

That's one of the lovliest things that someones ever said to me, thank you Tracy, you made my eyes go all watery .

You're not a nobody, and I am very proud to know you, and that you like me , is a huge boost to my confidence actually. I hold you in the highest esteem as far as people go.

I can't even begin to imagine what it's like having delusions, though I've experienced people with them (mostly Jody, Mathews brother), and his are pretty bad. He thinks the people on TV are all laughing at him and telling him to do bad things, and if you talk to him, he doesn't know if he imagined you talking or if it was all in his head. He sometimes thinks that God or Jesus have been talking to him and telling him to purge the world of sinners. He wont believe you if you tell him you don't mean him any harm.

It must be more than hard, terrible, not knowing what is really real and what's not. Like walking around in an ever shifting dream. It would be hard to trust people, or know if they are being honest with you or not. I can't swear on here but it's a "poo" of a situation to find yourself in and not have control over. Sometimes I hate how complicated our brains are and how little it takes to harm them and it changes us so much, even if it's only temporary.

I'm always going to be somewhere hovering annoyingly in the background if you need me. I haven't been able to get much enjoyment from posting on here lately but I'm always hanging around the computer. VERY chuffed I'm not blocked on anything . But if you did block me or something, I wont hold it against you, ok? Hope you know that.


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## Flashy (Dec 23, 2008)

I didn't mean to make your eyes watery. Sorry. I just spoke the truth, that's all.

I hate my apparent delusions. It's really hard when you feel something is real and others are telling you it's not, or when you are confused about what is real and what isn't. If they are delusions I've had some pretty odd ones (one psych I saw said they sounded 'pretty weird', lol, so they must have been). I was, however, honest with the doc yesterday about everything and he wanted to put nme in hospital over Christmas, lol (well, he wanted me assessed and he only ever says that when he means hospital), but he hasn't done either, which is good, although he did try to get me to go back and see him tomorrow. Which I'm not doing. I am willing to try some new meds in the new year though so maybe that will help.

On the other hand, all my buns seem to be doing really well at the moment. And today I went out and bought 17 basil plants for them to eat as a Christmas treat when they come in on Christmas day  I am looking forward to them having a great time on Christmas day. They all come in for a run around the presents (mine are all for them and mum wraps them up without sellotape so that the buns can unwrap them themselves) and last year they had a great time and they were so happy. I can't wait to get lots of pictures and videos this year 

I haven't blocked you by the way, I'm just not online at the mo, that's the same for everyone  although I have come online sporadically recently to ge tPolly's avatar pics.

And Becca, I feel like I gave you a hard time about Fluffball, that's what I was meaning.


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## Becca (Dec 23, 2008)

Ooooh Don't worry about it Tracy 

And I can't wait to see the pics and vids of the buns unwrapping their pressies!! I love what you do for your bunnies Tracy 

Their going to have an awesome christmas


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## animal ry (Dec 23, 2008)

awwwwwwwww i love your buns there beautifull


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## polly (Dec 25, 2008)

Merry christmas Tracy, Its Hercules. I love my present thankuu veery much and my cousins Pogo and Polo ya know I love ya girls :biggrin2:Mum took some piccies she had to help me a little bit i get confoosed easy and wasn't sure what to do I think Belle and BEW are gonna love it too Fankooo :biggrin2::biggrin2:


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## Flashy (Dec 29, 2008)

[align=center]*Christmas in the Hutchingsâ house*[/align] [align=center]*[flash=320,256]http://uk.youtube.com/v/ToxKJfVSqW8[/flash]*[/align]* As well as videos, I took many pictures J Be WARNED this is VERY picture heavy!

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So that was the bunnies Christmas. They still have some presents still to open, those that my mum wrapped up for them (she wraps up a big bag full of presents and she just uses paper, with no sellotape, and the buns unwrap them themselves), and also Pollyâs one. They are nearly in Pollyâs one, and Lightning managed that on Boxing day, but most of the rest have remained still wrapped.
* [align=center]*[flash=320,256]http://uk.youtube.com/v/4DF-_ITZ6-w[/flash]*[/align]* Given I have waffled and moaned about it enough, Iâm pretty sure all who read this blog know that last week was Flashâs anniversary. I shut down and ignored it, but did release something for him on the 28[sup]th[/sup] (the day he was buried).
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In myself I am struggling astronomically, but still here. Life is really rough, but hey, no one can actually do anything, so Iâm stuck with it and that's really gutting. At least, currently, all the bunnies seem to be doing ok.*


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## polly (Dec 29, 2008)

Trace the pics are fantastic looks like everybunny had great fun :biggrin2:

Flash's tribute was beautiful that balloon was so cool I wonder how far it went !


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## NZminilops (Dec 29, 2008)

Tracy, you missed where I said that was the nicest thing said to me , the eyes watering was a good thing you silly goose. I was all teary eyed from happiness. You chose to ignore that bit though and said sorry when there was nothing to be sorry for :?, I was saying thank you.

Your pictures are so cute , we didn't 'do' christmas so it's lovely to see your rabbits having so much fun.

I'm sorry that you are struggling and if there was something I could do, I would do it.


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## JadeIcing (Dec 29, 2008)

I love the pictures. Looks like you all had fun.


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## SOOOSKA (Dec 29, 2008)

Tracy your pictures are wonderful. I especially love The Dopeys they are so cute, well actually all your Babies are cute.

Did you have them all out at the same time? Gosh can I say spoilt bunnies, they sure got alot of goodies from Santa. Lucky Buns.

Susan

PS

Beautiful tribute to Flash.


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## Flashy (Dec 29, 2008)

I would have LOVED to be able to have them all out at once but whilst some would cope with others there would be definite fights, Sky, Badger and Star would fight with everyone, Candyfloss and Dopey 2 would fight, Lightning, Angel and Dusk would all fight each other and probably everyone else, Sandy would demand everyone bow down to her and when they didn't she would scrap with them, and Dawn would chase everyone off. Infact, probably only the fosters would be accepting of tohers buns, and thats because mine have only known being spoilt rotten, and my fosters have had some hard times, lol. I have a bunch of ungrateful brats, but I love them anyway. I would LOVE a complete swarm of rabbits that swarmed everywhere as a 17  but it would never happen. At the moment it's just singles, pairs or trios, although come spring, who knows what might happen.


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## NorthernAutumn (Dec 29, 2008)

It looks like you've had a wonderful Xmas, Tracy. Everybunny looks so happy!
Gonna have to get some basil plants for my fuzzies.
I really enjoyed Flash's tribute too. Am glad that his anniversary was remembered with more joy this year:hug:

Can't wait for a vid of Sky rocking out on Guitar Hero!


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## Becca (Dec 30, 2008)

Looks like your buns had a super Christmas Tracy 

I love the Flash Tribute - It's really nice :shock:

Hope you start feeling a little better soon  Like Michelle said if there was something we could do we'd do it in a heartbeat 

Becca x


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## CorkysMom (Dec 30, 2008)

Love the tribute, what a neat idea! 

I hope you get to feeling better soon.....


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## Flashy (Dec 31, 2008)

*Tilly had another injection today and is doing really well with how she is holding her head  Which is fantastic. Summer, to me, has been looking a little on the boney side down her spine, but has a nice full, round belly, so I asked my vet what he thought (Summer comes along with Tilly because it doesn't phase her, and Tilly needs the support). He agreed that she is feeling thin. She has a greta appetite and the trio are already getting more than I would normally give, but he said while she is willing and able, it might just be she is not getting enough during the cold weather. I'm not so sure on this, but am willing to go with the multiple feeds, and feeding her separately (I'm also going to give oats), but I have other thoughts on this. When she came to me she had a small lump in her skin, on her hip. My vet said it was a cyst, and when the RSPCA vet tried to drain it nothing came out (the RSPCA vet is very not good), and I also asked them to remove it when she was spayed, but they refused. My main concern is that this tumour is causing the weightloss. The other possibility, in my eyes, is that she is still recovering from the tape worm. I considered and dismissed teeth as an issue because she is stuffing both pellets and hay with no problems at all. 

It's all very reminiscent of Sweep, and that worries me. I could easily handle 'my' Summery going to a new home, but I can't bare the thought of losing her here, especially to something that should have been sorted months ago, although I would far prefer her to die here than elsewhere (for her sake, and the sake of the others). If I lose her then Roger and Tilly will become a permanent feature of this household and I will juggle some of the bondings here (I will probably split up Candyfloss and Cloud (who are a bit of a volatile pair), and bond Candyfloss with Roger and Tilly, and rebond Cloud with the Dopeys).

Candyfloss and Cloud havebeen having some problems. They are bonded still, but they are very volatile. He gets moods, and she is very nervy, so if he is in a mood, she reacts badly to that. I have had to move them into a bigger run (but with a smaller hutch area) to allow for more running if necessary. They do sit together sometimes, and they occassionally groom. They don't fight, but they don't appear to be as happy as they could be. I have been mulling over my different options. The first thought is that Cloud could go back with the Dopeys. That leaves Candyfloss. She is not a fighter and could do with a mother hen bunny friend like Roger, who just wants to adore, however he is currently not mine. That means my options are Dusk, Sky and Badger. Star is out because he is a turd and that would scare Candyfloss (I did have a vague idea of bonding him with the Dopeys, but obviously that may go out the window). I know for sure that Sandy wouldn't bond with Sky or Badger, and intended to bond her with Dusk (Sandy permitting), so ideally Candyfloss would go with Sky or Badger. I think the ideal candidate is Badger because he is not a fighter, however that could not happen until after I have rearranged my room in the spring because none of the cages would be big enough for her (and she has become a BIG bunny), but I do know for sure she would LOVE to be an indoor bun.

Personally I'm just not comfortable with Cloud and Candyfloss being together and acting as they are now. So all that up there is just musings, and if ANYONE managed to follow all the different bunnies and options then I'm impressed. I have so many buns that there MUST be a good solution here. I would love having Candyfloss in my room, but she can only come in to be bonded with someone. 

Currently I have 5 sets of buns in my room, and come spring I will be making that down to 3 groups, either by bonding, or just moving buns outside, to allow all the buns to have more space. The only buns who are not available for any bondings are obviously currently the Fosters and also Lightning and Angel who are intact, but the rest are all potentially bondable, which leaves 12 buns to play around with (although to be fair I can think of at least two who would object to any change, lol).

Star is finally back to himself and it's lovely to see him all sparky again. I've missed that  He even stood up on his back legs to greet me yesterday, which is the first time in a long time too  He's finally forgiven me!

In terms of me I took myself to the docs this morning. Again he talked about going into hospital, and he added more options this time. Funnily enough we did none of them, but I have been given anti-psychotics to knock me out if I feel myself start to dissociate (he said they will slow me down, lol, so that could be interesting), and he wants me to go back on Friday (he's keeping a VERY close eye on me) and he will give me some anti depressants. He also made me promise that if I feel dangerous between now and then to call the out of hours docs (including tomorrow during the day). He also told me that I have the most insight into my illness than any other patient he sees (the only person he knows who has more insight is his best friend, and he is obviously not his doctor)*


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## Sabine (Dec 31, 2008)

Wow, my mind boggles with all the bonding options. You must have some huge room to have so many sets of buns indoors. I had to move our indoor cage outside to make room for Christmas mayham. Secretely I wish I had as many bunnies. Hope you are going to feel better too. Wishing you and all your buns a happy new year. Sabine


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## Flashy (Jan 1, 2009)

I felt it was good and tidy to have a new blog from today, so here it is.

Flash's Place- 2


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